Alli

Filling the void.

2011-02-07T14:25:00.003-07:00

When you can't decide on one, just get two! Introducing the newest members of the Stewart family.... Cooper & Tilly!

I think it's safe to say that Rich and Di were getting a little lonely now that all the kids are gone...

If you don't like dogs, don't read on cause you'll probably think I'm crazy.

2011-01-14T15:24:00.002-07:00

I love dogs. A LOT. I take a liking to most dogs. Friend's dogs, homeless dogs, stranger's dogs...But my dog was honestly the best dog ever. It has taken me this long to write anything because it honestly was like losing a sibling. We had to put Riley to sleep the week before Christmas and I would say that as a family, it was the hardest thing we've ever had to do. We had talked about this day for years, and most recently the last few months, but that didn't make it any easier. We used to joke that we may need family counseling when he dies and we honestly weren't too far from it!

The weird thing about a dog is that they truly become part of your family. I was 14 when we got Riley. That is half of my life! We look back at pictures of when he was a puppy and we were so young! It's hard to believe that we had him for that long, but at the same time, I can't remember not having him.

I think my mom said it best when she said that getting us that dog was the best thing may parents ever did because it teaches children a love that they never knew existed. He truly was a part of family and will truly be missed!

I'm in love...

2010-12-02T16:54:00.004-07:00

with Brandon Flowers. Not only do I think he is brilliant, but he is easy on the eyes as well. And I can't help but think that a certain Aaron Davis may have copied some of Brandon's dance moves...For those of you who know Aaron, you know what I'm talking about...I am obsessed with this song and music video lately. The five minutes it takes to watch will not disappoint!

This is why my mom is cool.

2010-11-26T12:35:00.004-07:00

So my mom was on the news last night...she ran in the Cottonwood Heights 5k yesterday and she told us that we needed to watch cause she was interviewed. Needless to say, I was appauled when she popped up on TV. I know it was cold outside but BLESS HER!

On a sidenote, we had to watch it about 10 times and I thought my dad was going to bust a blood vessel he was laughing so hard...

Hope everyone had a happy turkey day!

Birthday Post!

2010-11-24T13:29:00.008-07:00

We've had a few birthdays for a couple of AWESOME gals. Nothing says happy birthday like a big birthday bash! And, BOTH were monumental because BOTH turned the big 30! First was Haylie's in October. We were trying to figure out how we could surprise her and what better way than a good ol' kidnapping. We tried our hardest not to laugh but I'm pretty sure she knew who was taking her captive after about 30 seconds. And it's a good thing it was close to Halloween so we could get our masks on.

We made the trek from 7200 South to North Salt Lake in complete silence. Except for the Hilary Weeks she got to enjoy and the rap to B.O.B's Airplanes in a disguised voice by yours truly.

With all the girls, we like to do some sort of theme birthday cake and it only made sense to make an Owl for Haylie. Not only is this her signature jewelry piece, but it's also supposed to bring good luck!

The Culprits

The party planners!

Next we had Heather's bday in November. Coming up with a cake theme was hard and then we finally decided on something that only makes sense. Heather grew up playing volleyball on the beaches of Cali. She has naturally dark skin 365 days a year which I am completely envious of. In the summer, she gets sooo dark that she honestly could be another race. It only made sense to throw her a fiesta to celebrate her mexican heritage!

Happy Birthday girls!

Happy Halloween!!

2010-11-08T12:26:00.013-07:00

This year, we decided that we would rather do a big date night instead of party hopping! It was such a blast to be with all our friends and just hang out..
The Group, first the gals.

Now, the guys.

And a Halloween party would not be complete without the individuals!

Bless Matt's heart. When he asked if he needed to dress up and I told him that I already had his costume, I don't think he knew what he was saying yes to! We were supposed to be trolls, but the costume went awry and we were labeled as either crayons, game pieces, or the Grinch and Avatar.

Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Wuff

The Gypsie and the Lumberjack

Toy Story!

Mrs. Potter and Lumiere

Care Bears!

Screech & Lisa

Zack & Kelly

Jessie & Slater

My personal favorite....Harry & Lloyd

The Bee & the Cowboy

Ricky & Lucy

And last but not least, the Twister Board!

We laughed until we cried and ate til our little heart's were content! Happy Halloween!

Lost from the fold

2010-09-10T11:24:00.006-06:00

I have hung out with this fun group of girls for the last couple of years and it's about damn time that one of us got married!! Jessie(aka, Sleezy Speazy) got hitched a few weeks ago. We had an awesome bachelorette party up in PC, which sadly, I don't have any pictures from.

The sealing was beautiful and we love Aaron so we couldn't be happier for these two!

On our way down to bid them farewell...

Lately....

2010-09-10T10:40:00.009-06:00

Last year, we went up the Colter Bay on a whim with a guy that I was dating. We had so much fun that we decided to go back this year with the girls! I'm pretty sure that this will be an annual trip from now on.

We left on a Friday in two different shifts. By the time my car got there at 9PM it was pouring! We met the gals at Leeks, a little delicious pizza joint right on the water. The place was packed and the girls had already taken the liberty of buying these bad boys...

One piece long johns from the general store. Naturally, we had to one too so that was our next stop...
The next morning we went for a little hike around the lake. This included a photo shoot, homemade baseball, and a little photo of me as a whitetrash prego.

It is kind of scary how easily entertained we are....

That afternoon we rented some little motor boats that have a top speed of about 7. We basically just needed an avenue to lay out and these boats were the perfect option.

Boat 1

Boat 2
We had a near death experience when we decided to race these puppies. Let's just say there was almost a collision and they are way harder to drive than they look!
Later that night, we decided to be old school and do a YW craft. Thanks to Nanc for bringing the goods.

The culminating event was when our boat rental boys invited us to a bonfire that night. We were pretty sure that they were just going to be drinking the whole time so we came up with the best idea to spice things up a little bit. We all picked our favorite movie, favorite character from that movie, and pretty much became that person for the evening. We had a rodeo queen, a lawyer, a vet specializing in large cats, and an owner of a lawn mowing business called "bikini cuts". For years, my favorite movie was Twister so naturally, I was a storm chaser from Oklahoma. They ate up every word of it and I thought they might fall over over when I told them I had seen a cow fly....It was highly entertaining to say the least!

We had such a blast and can't wait to go back next year!

Introducing....

2010-07-08T17:07:00.004-06:00

Ryan G. Stewart
Born June 20th, 2010. We all thought there was NO WAY they would have another redhead..but Adam and Brooke are producing them like like they're going out of style!!!

Not so fast Mary Smith....

2010-05-21T11:30:00.004-06:00

People are sneaky. Good thing I have some sort of a brain to figure this out. I recently became a home owner. Scary I know, but I decided to join the big girl club and take the plunge. The new joint is below.

It will be finished in about 3 weeks so naturally, I've been trying to figure out how to organize the place. If any of you remember the couch incident, it was the reason I moved out of my old place and ultimately decided to buy. This lovely couch as seen below, has been sitting in my brother's storage unit. Untouched and only sat on two or three times, she's lovely but not exactly what I am looking for to fill my family room space.

I decided to post it on KSL to see what kind of response I would get. Enter Mary Smith. First red flag. Could the name be any more generic?

About an hour after I posted it, I got an email from Mary asking if it was still available because she was interested. I responded and said it was and that I would be happy to show it to her at anytime. She quickly responded saying that she was away doing some contract work and that she would send a check and have her movers come and pick it up. Weird that she doesn't even want to see it before buying it...Red flag #2.

I responded telling her that I needed a cashier's check and a phone number so that I could contact her after I had made sure the check was good. I don't hear anything for a day. Meanwhile, her email address was something I had never heard of before. I decided to look it up. Lo and behold, straight out of India. Last time I checked, there weren't any Indians named Mary Smith.

"Mary" finally responds and says that she has sent the check and that she "accidentally" made it out for $1000 over my asking price and that I could keep $100 of that for the trouble and give the rest to the movers when they pick up my couch. Nice try Mary. I'm not an idiot. Pretty sure that additional money is for whoever is going to help you scam me. She also said she couldn't respond to me because she was typing from a hearing impaired computer. Code for "I don't speak English".

We'll see what this check from India looks like when it arrives but the joke's on you Mary. Next time, try scamming someone who doesn't have half a brain.

On a sidenote, the couch is still available and SOOO comfy if anyone is interested!!

Me-hi-co continued...

2010-05-04T13:28:00.031-06:00

We left for Mexico a month ago today and I just barely got the pics from everyone! We had such a blast and I couldn't have picked more fun girls than the nine that I was with( except for Heather, we missed you!) We have traveled all over together and every trip we go on is somehow better than the last. There's a lot of pics so buckle up!

The Mariner of the Seas. We had lots of good times on this ship!

The Utah 10. This is what we were so loving referred to by our Cruise director on the ship.

Doing a little exploring on our first day.

Although it looks like I'm pissed at her, I wasn't. Kel was the best roomie ever!

At dinner one night.

Some of the gals in the karaoke competition. They clearly were not messing around.

Nine out of the ten of us at sunset.

One of our formal nights.

Beautiful Cabo!

On our way to Lovers Beach!

We had to be taxied into Cabo and on our way over we passed a yellow boat. This naturally led to all of us singing "We all live in a yellow submarine" at the top of our lungs. It was hilarious!

The way they drive in Mexico would never fly in the US!

Just one of the amazing sunsets we saw. The excitement was uncontainable!

Getting off the boat one day.

Taking it all in.....

Elissa has a family friend who owns a hotel in Mazatlan so this is how we got there. Mazatlan is GHETTO so we opted to go there. It was such a blast!

$20 to go parasailing off the beach. I was having second thoughts after I saw the row boat that was pulling me and how many people he cut off. It was beautiful though!

We ALL wanted to take this little girl home with us. She was selling up chicklets as we sat on the beach and couldn't have been older than two. They train them young..

We spent a fair amount of time doing this. Missy was the BARGAIN queen!

We tried a little rock climbing on our last day.

This was the best part of the trip made mostly by my hot little mexican friend named Victor that had to rescue me. All I will say is that there was stradling involved and that the mexicans in Puerta Vallarta are a far cry from the mexicans in Utah. Pretty sure we'll be heading back there at some point.

Our last formal night, we thought it would be a good idea to try and take pictures with the sunset. It was sooo windy and our pictures turned out to be less than stellar....

A nightly ritual. I'm not joking. Two desserts each. No wonder we were the last ones out of there each night!

After one of our formal nights, we changed our clothes and were on our way to get our dance on. We happened to pass a photographer who was less than thrilled with our spontaneous photo op. I personally think it couldn't have turned out better!

Last day on the Promenade! So sad to leave!

Thanks for the trip gals! There is not a group of girls I would rather be with!

Me-hi-co

2010-04-14T13:59:00.002-06:00

I just got back from this lovely country a few days ago. While I took a total of 6 pictures, I will be sure to give a full report when I get the hundreds that my friends took. As much as we thought there would maybe be a group of 10 single guys that would be dying to hang out with us on our cruise, I can sadly report that there wasn't even one. That is why we hit the jackpot on our Zip line tour in Puerta Vallarta. I can honestly say that I haven't ever been attracted to mexicans before. In the words of my friend Missy, "I have been born again!"

I am aware that I look homeless in this picture but these boys made our tour so much more fun! The definite highlight was when I got stuck out in the middle of the zip line and had to be rescued by Victor. This included being straddled and pulled back to the platform. Too bad it was the last run because I'm pretty sure that we would have made it a point to get stuck out there!

Next trip: One week in Puerta Vallarta hanging out with these boys!

More cruise pictures to come!

So, it's been a while....

2010-02-25T17:26:00.010-07:00

Where has the time gone??? I wish I could say that I haven't been blogging because nothing exciting has happened in the past few months. That just wouldn't be true so I will try summarize what I've been up to.

First off, December started out with a bang! I got a new job at:

and I honestly couldn't be happier! I was starting to get suicidal at my old job so it was a welcomed change!

If I'm being completely honest, I hate that my birthday is on New Years. I always try to be out of town but this year, that just wasn't going to happen. My cute friends were determined to make it fun so they threw a little birthday party for Missy and I! Since we don't get drunk, we are forced to have alternative fun, i.e. twister, human pyramids, and Win, Lose, or Draw. As you will see a little further down, we are easily entertained so it ended up being really fun!

In January we took a little weekend vacay to Bear Lake to participate in the annual Bear Lake Monster. This consists of one-piece snowsuits, homemade relays, lotto tickets at Gladys, and just a darn good time.

In February, it was Kimi's birthday. A few months back, we were discussing the fact that since she was turning 31 and STILL not married, her life was pretty much over. Leave it to us girls to get an idea and run with it. What better way to celebrate than have a funeral themed birthday party! I am fully aware that this sounds totally creepy but it was hysterical and a day dedicated to Kimi. Just a few pics....

And finally over Presidents day, we took an epic trip to Sun Valley. This is where we originally purchased our one-piece snowsuits. It's no secret that I love them so naturally I had to buy another.

As much as I love the classic 80's, I'll be wearing this one ALL THE TIME. I'm pretty sure it's a designer brand and I just couldn't pass it up. Anytime I can purchase something with fur, there is absolutely no hesitation.

Sun Valley is so much fun in the winter, there's not a whole lot to do and since I don't ski, I have become real good at sledding. Case in point.

This hill was fantastic. We were a little hesitant since last year on this same trip we ended up in the ER. It ended up just being a real good time.

And last but not least. it wouldn't have been a complete weekend without meeting some guys. An entire hockey team from Missoula to be exact. May have been the funniest night of my life and most of it went down inside this creepy motel. We had to get a picture on our way out of town to document....

So there it is in a nutshell. I guess all we need now are some men, specifically 10, that can keep up with us. We're always on the lookout but until then, we'll just keep on truckin!

Does it get any better than THIS??

2009-11-13T16:30:00.002-07:00

Bad dates really are hilarious. At the time, no, but after the fact, so classic....I wish I could claim this one...

A friend of mine went out to dinner with a friend who has always liked her. I think things took a turn for the worst when he said this:

"I could have made love to you and I think the two of us could have really had a lot of fun that way."

Yes, he did actually say that. I would have paid to see the look on her face.

Polygs.

2009-11-03T15:18:00.010-07:00

A few weeks ago, my girlfriends and I went to St. George for a little weekend getaway. We couldn't help but notice all of the polygs down there. I came up with the brilliant idea that we should be sister wives for Halloween. It really couldn't have turned out better and I don't think I have laughed that hard in a long time. Tears, I tell you. Tears.

We spent the weekend at a cabin up north somewhere and the guys that we went with had no idea we were dressing up. The look on their faces while we filed down the stairs was shocking. Probably because we have never looked uglier. Case in point.

We had 10 wives and our friend Monique was the husband. It was amazing how a little makeup could turn her into a man.

As a sidenote, I would like to mention that one of the guys said I looked the worst. It was a real self esteem booster...

We stopped at Quiznos on the way up. The cashiers were scared of us and really weren't sure if we were dressed up or not.

Haylie won for the best hair. At first, it looked too good, so we had to make it uglier. This is what we came up with.

We did A LOT of laughing, followed by some stunts, a little football game, and a nature walk as evidence below. We also dressed up on Saturday night so the guys could see what a little makeup could do for us.

The winners.

The losers.

So.....

2009-10-30T11:39:00.003-06:00

I had a blind date last night courtesy of my aunt and uncle. As I opened the door, I came to the realization that they must hate me.

It was real bad.

We talked about software, how Olive Garden has the best soup in the state, and about his 2 for 1 coupon that paid for my meal.

There was also a lot of silence.

I have never been more happy to be home by 8:30.

Please, no!

2009-10-22T11:12:00.002-06:00

So, the above picture has nothing to really do with my post but I thought I could segway into my story about yesterday's event.

A few years back, when I first started doing marketing at my company, we were desperate.

Clearly, that is true from what you see above.

We were creating a brochure and needed a doctor. The photographer, who was actually legit, suggested that I sport the coat, and the stethoscope for this lovely portrayal. I had to laugh as I hadn't showered that day, and got out of bed about 20 minutes earlier. I hardly look like a doctor and we had to take about 20 pics because I kept laughing. So mature at the wise age of 24... Needless to say, they didn't end up using my photo. Geez, I wonder why???

Anyhoo, let it be known that I HATE doctors. Actually anything that has to do with a doctor which includes a clinic, hospital, ambulance, nurse, shots, pills, pain, etc. A few months ago, I got nothing more than a head cold. It soon passed and I felt fine but I still sounded sick. I had an occasional sore throat but I was starting to sound like a smoker. But, by far the worst side effect was snoring! Snoring has got to be one of my biggest pet peeves when trying to fall asleep and there have been many a night where I have cursed my dad as we shared a hotel room. I never thought that I would EVER be that person!

So, my mom finally convinced me to go to the doctor. First off, I couldn't find the place and I spilled my whole water bottle in my lap on the way there. Not a good sign. It probably wasn't doing me any favors as I walked into the clinic looking like I had peed my pants. The smell alone in there almost made me two step my way right back out.

When I was filling out the paperwork, I mentioned that I had cold-like symptoms, simply because you can't state, "sounds like a man when talking". That immediately got me a fun little mask to wear while I was there. How degrading is that??? I was tempted to take a big breath of air through my nose to show them that I really wasn't sick.

I finally meet with the doctor, and I've pretty much convinced myself that he's gonna diagnose me with lung cancer. What else could explain my persistent throat problem that has lasted 6+ weeks??

It doesn't help that I am sweating from the anxiety I have from being there. He starts checking all my holes with lights and poking me all over, apparently that is how they check for mono. At least that's what he said... Now that I think about it, that seems a little fishy. I truly felt bad for the guy when he had to feel my armpits and they were slightly moist, ya know, from the anxiety. Nothing a little rinse in the ol' sink won't fix. I figure, he's a doc so he's had to have seen worse.

He tells me to open my mouth as he shines that little light in there. His next statement was, "holy crap, have you looked in here?" I didn't know what that meant, but for sure it wasn't good.

My response was, "no sir, but pretty sure I've never looked in my throat before so I have no idea what I would be looking for."

Apparently my tonsils were HUGE! Enough that he told me it was most exciting thing he's seen all day. That's sad.

No wonder I've been sounding like a man! There was about 5 cm between them. He gave me some pills, told me to take them and come back in a week. If nothing has changed, dun dun dun, I'll be going under the knife. Hopefully my drugs will do the trick!

**I would like to personally thank Nancy for the horror stories she told me last night about her tonsil removal. It resulted from paranoia and no sleep. You're a peach.

"Just Friends"

2009-10-08T10:36:00.010-06:00

Ever since we took Diego to Lagoon in August, I've been getting weekly phone calls about going bowling at FatCats with the girls. His dream finally came true Saturday night. When I picked him, he was looking very dapper in his dockers, plaid shirt, and sweater vest. I was greeted with a kiss on the hand ane he was very anxious about seeing the girls. Throughout the night, he felt the need to mention that we are all "just friends". It's a good thing he keeps reminding us!

Diegs had never met Kelli before and later told me that he thought she was a very cute, sweet girl. Such a ladies man...

When someone got a strike, Diegs would bump arms like this.

Seeing as it was conference weekend, we decided to have a sleepover that night, followed by some pre-confererenc breakfast.

If this hot chocolate was for sale, I would for sure buy it. Heather is totally selling it...

Sleazy Spizzy decided to lead us because when they stood to sing, we did too. I'll spare you the audio, it was not good...

All in all, it was a great weekend!

What a way to start a Monday

2009-10-05T11:16:00.003-06:00

So, this morning I was at the gym. It was early, and surprisingly, I didn't mind being there. As I was on the eliptical machine, I noticed this cute little couple in their mid 60's working out together. I don't know what it was about them, but they just looked cute. They walked down the stairs about 15 minutes before I did. As I finished my workout, I headed to the locker room to wash my hands before I left. Imagine my surprise as that same "cute" lady was standing butt naked, facing me as I came around the corner. Really?? It's like she was waiting for me, right in my path to the sink. As I tried to recall, I'm pretty sure that upstairs, 15 minutes earlier, her workout was minimal at most. She definitely wasn't sweaty enough to justify a shower. I know it's a locker room but couldn't she have stepped into one of the stalls? The handi stall was for sure big enough to accomodate her nakedness...

She suddenly became not so cute.

On that note, I don't think I will ever be comfortable enough with my bod to just strut my stuff around a locker room and I don't understand how a lot of people are!It would be one thing if it was attractive ladies but it is ALWAYS done by those who definitely shouldn't. I know you know what I mean. As a 12-year-old swimming at Steiner, I never got used to it and call me immature, but I still am not.

Unfortunately, I don't hide my emotions well and I'm pretty sure she saw me dry heave as I walked by. It didn't help that I had music blaring through my headphones, so who knows what kind of sick sound I made.

I didn't think it could worse until I walking out and noticed that she was standing on the scale, in her GARMENTS. Again, really?? I think we all know there is a time and a place for those and a gym locker room DOES NOT fall into this category.

It's little wonder that people think Mormons are freaks.

Um.....yes please.

2009-10-01T11:16:00.004-06:00

Well folks, after a long, fantastic summer, my fav show is about to start up again. October 21st is the big day and if this post and my previous post aren't enough to get you watching, maybe this dreamy picture of Tim Riggins will hook you.

I've said it before and I'll say it again. I promise you won't be disappointed even if the only thing you get out of it is feasting upon these chiseled abs for an hour.

Texas Forever.

It's day 1, and I am already dying

2009-09-21T12:21:00.002-06:00

So, a friend of mine gave me this crazy idea to start this little 12 week diet. I am not doing it for the diet aspect, just to tone my not-so-fab areas. She has been doing it for a 9 weeks and not only does she love it, but she is seeing awesome results.

Enter me.

I bought the program about a month ago and have been putting off starting it. To be frank, a big part of my social life is eating out and this little program virtually eliminates that. I was having nightmares of sitting around a table with all my friends, salivating, all while sipping my water out of my trusty water bottle. I honestly can't think of anything more miserable. I decided to bite the bullet and start it today.

Let me paint a picture of how my morning went.

This little gem requires me to get up at 6, something I haven't done since high school. Normal people are supposed to down a protein shake and then head to the gym. I decided it was in my better interests to down a protein shake and head back to bed. As a side note, if the the taste of that protein shake was any indication of what the next 12 weeks is going to be like, the chances of me sticking to this are slim to none. I slept for another hour and then I had to eat again. Seriously?? I am not even hungry. I forced down a breakfast burrito which wasn't half bad.

Enter the water.

Let it be known. I am not a big water drinker. Sure, if I am working out, love it. But never ever would I just pour myself a tall glass of water. I have tried on several occasions to overcome this and I keep going straight back to my milk. I am now required to drink 4 LITERS of water A DAY!!!!!!

Does anyone comprehend how much that is?? I may as well just take my laptop to the bathroom with me. It is 12:30 and I have already been 5 times. It just seems so unnatural. It's like I always have the signal but I just hold it until my bladder is about to burst. My little water bottle just stares at me and every few minutes, I force myself to take a few swigs.

I am not kidding when I say I have never detested something so much.

I even googled to make sure it wasn't harmful to drink that much. Because I am pretty sure there was a story a few years back about parents who killed their child by making him drink too much water. All I can say is, Lord help me. This will for sure be my biggest task during the next 12 weeks. Hopefully it will all pay off when I become svelte with killer abs. I'll report back my results.

Wish me luck! Time to eat again!

Diego....our prince

2009-09-15T16:44:00.006-06:00

Diego is a classic. We first met back in highschool and I hadn't been in touch with him until he found me on Facebook. Back in April, he wanted to go to Lagoon so I told him that I would get some friends and we would plan a day in August. I think I got a phone call once a week until August, reminding me that we were going. Here is a recent email I got from Diego after we went. I hope you can tell how great Diego is...

Alli , I just wanted to thank you for hanging out with me to Lagoon last night and it was fun , and we had a great time? i am very appreciated . i am glad i met your friends are Kimi, Monique , Nancy , Jessie, Missy, Elissa, and Jenny , too .
i like them very much because they are my new friends forever , of course . I am a Ladies' man because i like girls very much and i am very irresistible to women and i understand women so much . i liked the rides very much , my favorite rides are : Roller-Coaster ( with white trails ), Bumper Cars , Musical Express , Merry-go-Round like a Carousel , Tilt-A-Twirl , Dracula's Castle and Terror-ride . also Rattle-snake Rapids , too . remember i told you about because i am so brave to go to that Roller-Coaster like 2 times is twice though , too . Lagoon was fun and we all had a good time , and thank you for hanging out last night and i am so happy that you get in touch with me and thanks for calling me ? you are my favorite friend i met a very long time like since High School (Highland) for the past 11 years in 1999 , too . sometime we will go Bowling , maybe at Fat Cats is very close to my house , the Bowling is on 37th South and 9th East , of course . i will bring my own Bowling Ball Bag with my Bowling Ball inside , too .
you, me, and the girls will go Bowling sometime and we will eat Pizza at The Pizza Factory by Fat Cats , okay . Hey, remember we all can go to Disneyland until next summer of 2010 is next year , we all going to stay for a vacation like 3 , 4, 5 days . want to do that?! maybe Disneyland is in California or Florida , of course . we all stay in these Hotels there , there is no trouble at all though .
I want to thank you for hanging out with me to Lagoon last night , and you are really a good friend to me . sometime we will go to the park and play , i will give you and them more massages , all right . i hope you have a great week and take care and write me back , you know my E-mail address? it is ************** , okay . next time , you and the girls will come to my house and see me and my art workings , okay . bye-bye , Alli .

And yes, we all did receive massages from Diegs at Lagoon. He also let us know that he was only looking for friendship. It was a good thing he made that clear.

He is such a little tender heart and seemed to fall for both Nancy and Monique. Was I a little jealous?? Of course I was. How can you not love a guy who refers to you as his princess?? Here are some pics of our day.

Elissa claims she was still wet from Raddlesnake Rapids....pretty sure the White Rollercoaster had an impact on her. She's not fooling anyone...

The best part of the day was when we decided to get some Saloon pics. Diegs was loving every second of this and I think the pics turned out pretty fantastic.

If Diegs has his way, you'll be seeing another post next summer when we hit up Disneyland. The phone calls have already been pouring in!

If only we would have known.

2009-07-30T12:41:00.003-06:00

Last night, I came home from work and Mike and I were watching the news. They were doing a story on how all the FLDS people were protesting in front of the Matheson court house about some land dispute. There were hundreds of them....everywhere. We started discussing the possibilities of us heading down to hang out with that crowd. I can already see it. The big poof, no makeup, the homely dress, I think I would probably fit right in. Can you imagine us hob-nobbin' with all the peeps? Conversations would be classic. My only concern is that they all seemed to know each other. Mike just said we could say we were new. If this little debate continues, you better believe we will be down there creepin around.

Oops!

2009-07-30T10:49:00.002-06:00

So last night, I went to get a shake with my parents at Hires. I may or may not have said this to the waitress when she took our order.

"Can you please shit that for us?"

Shit, split. Same thing.

J to the ackson

2009-07-30T10:12:00.011-06:00

So this picture pretty much sums up our vaca to Jackson last weekend. It was full of good friends, good laughs and good times. We stayed in Colter Bay in what they call "tent cabins". This is basically high-end camping for those who are too high maintenance to seriously rough it. My response to this was "yes, please." I would camp all the time if my tent was already set up, access to hot water is plentiful, and I can turn a light on in my tent.

Mike was our host and we totally doubled his work load by being there. I'm pretty sure on about hour 2, he was questioning the invitation.

Not only did he heat our tent at night but he was consistently bringing over left over scraps from his family's meals. All we brought was crap so it was nice to get something healthy every once in a while.

On Friday night, he was nice enough to take us skiing. Once again, taking five girls on the boat when you are the only one who knows how to operate it is a task. He gave me a quick lesson in driving so that he was able to ski on the glassy glass too.

On Saturday, we decided to rent one of those motor boats that has a top speed of about 7mph. We thought we would take it out, catch some rays, and do a little swimming. What we didn't realize was how difficult it would be to get back in the boat. She may kill me but this was too funny not to post.

No, we didn't bring our parapalegic friend, Jess was just desperate to tan the back of her legs.

After our two hours of fun, we took the boat back. As we pulled up, this old man approached us and asked why we weren't wearing our life jackets. I didn't know that we had to wear them the whole time so he proceeded to yell at us, asked if we thought it was funny, and told us next time he was calling the cops. I would like to see what a cop what have done....please.

That night, after an awesome rain storm, we had a fire and roasted things.

It was a blast, as it always is with these fun gals! I'm so glad that my friends are as random as I am and are always up for a good road trip!

Until next weekend...

What??

2009-07-17T11:42:00.004-06:00

So, I broke up with this guy about nine months ago. It sucked and I had a really hard time getting over it. I am not kidding when I say that pretty much every weekend since we broke up, his brother has asked me out. Not only do I think that is shady and weird but does he honestly think we are going to date?? In the beginning, I kept telling him that I thought it was weird and that it would be too hard.

Now, nine months later, my excuses are running out. He called me earlier this week and said he was going to be in SL and wanted to get together. I decided that I would go to dinner so that he might stop calling me. Not that I don't think he's great, cause I do but it just seemed pretty pointless to me. He's a funny guy but definitely beats to his own drum. It was good to see him and we had some good laughs but the best part of dinner was when he said, and I quote,

"You're weird, but in a good way".

What? I'm not even sure what that means.
I think I fake laughed and said that I had to bounce.

Good thing I don't take offense easily. It's safe to assume that we won't be going out again anytime soon.

Palm Springs continued....

2009-07-07T15:55:00.007-06:00

We took a ton of pictures while we were there so I'll just post the best ones. Elissa was nice enough to let us stay at her place in Palm Springs and it was such a fun girls trip! It doesn't get much better than lounging at the pool everyday all day. Here are some of the highlights.

We found this creepy sleeping bag and Jessie tried to come in our room one night while we were dead asleep. It didn't phase Kelli and I, and Elissa is so out of it when she sleeps that she had no idea what was going on.

Have you ever seen those funny stores that sell all kinds of animals on t-shirts? They are totally creepy but we couldn't pass up the "wuff" tshirts. And I'm pretty sure we convinced the old guy that sold them to us that wolves is actually pronounced as wuffs. Poor guy wasn't sure if we were serious or not!

Every night we would go for a walk to try and walk off all the crap we ate and one night we decided to have a speed walking competition. I had no idea that the gals with short legs would kill me. We had to take a winner and loser picture.

We decided before we got there that we would all bring pictures of our ex-boyfriends and play this funny game. We covered ourselves and everyone had to guess who dated who. It was such great entertainment and very insightful too!

It was such a fun trip with such fun girls! Can't wait for the next one!

It's all about the networking.

2009-07-07T15:41:00.003-06:00

We decided a few weeks ago to throw a bbq. We figured that between the 9 of us, we all had to know differemnt people that we don't normally hang out with. Even though there were way more guys than girls, it ended up being a blast. There is nothing better than spending a summer night up the canyon.

this was a good night..

2009-07-07T11:29:00.009-06:00

I am completely aware that I haven't blogged in a coon's age but in my defense, I never have my camera and I just got all the pics from the gals...

A few weeks back, Kelli, Missy and I headed to Bear Lake for the weekend. There was a party that we heard about on the way up so we decided to stop by. We were pretty sure that this was the kind of party where we weren't going to meet any potentials so we made a stop at the Flying J in Logan and found some little monkies. We decided that if any one of us threw our monkies in the bushes, it meant we were talking to someone worth talking to. Let's just say, these little guys stayed on our backs the whole night. I'm sure people thought we were so weird but I will say that these little guys were great conversation starters...

Our friend Nate swore that he talked to way more girls with this bad boy on his back..

On to Bear Lake!

Kelli's cabin is famous for the Bear Lake monster. This is a relay that we create out of stuff around the house. This one did not disappoint. Between the crab walks, speedwalking, and filling that #@*! bucket with sand, this timed event was a hit.

And last but not least, what would Bear Lake be without some lottery tickets from the gas station and some poker. It's a good thing that we don't live closer to Vegas because we pretty much blew a ton a cash on those little lottery games. And all because Missy won $40 bucks. Lucky gal!

Thanks the the Dunkleys for letting Missy and I crash your family vacation!

Can't wait

2009-07-06T11:22:00.003-06:00

So for a few months, Kelli and I have wanted to get some beach cruisers. Yes, we are aware that we don't live by the beach, but we do live by several convenient stores and it happens to be slurpee season. We just want to ride to "Sev" for a refreshing treat a few times a week. We've been looking for a good month and haven't been able to find what we like. We decided to turn to the internet. What better place to find them than in Cali, the home of the beach cruiser. Since we don't have husbands, we recruited our dads to assemble these bad boys once they arrive. Kelli got baby blue and I ordered mine in orange. Much to my dismay, I received an email yesterday telling me that they were out of orange! What?? Orange is the greatest summer color of all time, possibly the reason why they are out. It would have matched perfectly with the baby blue, which is crucial cause we will ALWAYS be riding them together. They sent me some new color choices but nothing tickled my fancy like the orange one did. I frantically responded asking them how long it would be til they got more in. This little email arrived this morning!

Hi Allison,

We will get the orange in stock tomorrow. I will process your order accordingly and ship it tomorrow. If you have further question, please feel free to let me know.

Sincerely,

Adrien
Internet Sales Dep.

Thank you Adrien.....

The desert and the beach

2009-06-03T16:36:00.004-06:00

Within the last few weeks, the gals and I went to Palm Springs and the Bear Lake. Good times were had and when I get the pictures, I'll most definitely prove it. But here's just a little tease.

It's hard to believe that a few of my friends "faked" their way through swimming lessons as children. Doggy paddling will only get you so far girls. It's a good thing Elissa is teaching swimming lessons this summer so she could get a little practice in herself AND that this person's face is in the water so they can remain nameless. This was a source of many laughs for us and the 90 year old man who watched us out the window for 5 days. Bless him.

More pics to come!

Otis

2009-06-03T16:05:00.003-06:00

Don't be scared people. I wish I could say he was harmless but he gave me a look that said, "I'd like to bite your leg off" more than once. I'm not sure I've ever seen anything so ugly...Bless the Dunkley's for taking him on. I think he is so mean because he looks like a gremlin and he has a few snaggle teeth. It's just an insecurity. I hope that we can one day break the barrier and at least be cordial, Otis. I'm not really scared of anything but frankly, you scare the h*** out of me.

Don't mind if I do

2009-06-03T15:56:00.002-06:00

I had a Crave party last night and have decided that everyone needs to have one so you can stock up on shoes. 6 pairs for $70!! Can't beat that! This is what I woke up to this morning and it brought a smile to my face. A girl can never have enough shoes....

The birth of something beautiful...

2009-05-19T11:27:00.008-06:00

It's no secret that my tap class has seriously changed my life. It is not only fun, but it is also gives me a fantastic workout. The gals in my ward decided that they wanted in on Babs and her funness. Who knew that this would be the start of something so beautiful?? And I dare say that it's no coincidence our ward talent show happened to be six weeks after they started. Just enough time to whip up something wonderful.

So, without further ado, GIRLS ON TAP

Between the shimmy's and our kick line, I'm pretty sure that we stole the show.

Thanks to the "dance troop" for persevering through the new steps and your injuries. I see great things for us in the future. Barb would be proud!

P.S. Click here to see the real deal.

JoKes on YoU!

2009-05-13T12:20:00.003-06:00

Last night, I went down to Temple Square to plant flowers with my ward. As we were standing on the sidewalk, waiting for buckets of "dirt" aka horse crap, we saw something in the distance. A man was trying to maneuver his way on a unicycle down the sidewalk. That right there just makes me happy, I can't help it! If that wasn't good enough, he was also sporting a large bow tie and carrying a briefcase. I have no doubt that he rode that uni ride out of the church office building. As Molly and I saw him coming, we just had to stare. As he passed, I just smiled while Molly yelled, "YAY!" He just looked at us like we were idiots. Her tone made it seem like he was 5-years-old, learning to ride a bike for the first time, or a uni...

I don't know what it is but for some reason, I can't take a unicycler seriously. Balancing on that one wheel definitely takes skills, but what drives a person to ride one? Is it for attention? Reminds me of a classic story. My friend Ally was dating a guy when we were at the U. Things were going well until she saw him riding a unicycle on campus. It was a deal breaker. I can't blame her. As shallow as it seems, I would have pulled the same move....

Ode to the FNL

2009-05-04T13:03:00.008-06:00

Dear FNL,
My Friday nights aren't exactly the same without you. Besides The Bachelor, you were the one show that I looked forward to during the week. Even with DVR, I have to plan my night around you. We have FNL parties in your honor. Ten girls, sitting around watching a show based on football and your little town of Dillon, TX. I want to share one of our great FNL moments. During one of your heated football games, Kelli's brother had to ask, "You know this is just a TV show, right?" We know that FNL, but the drama you've created makes it all seem so real. Please don't be gone for long.

Heart,

Alli

If you haven't seen this show, I'm telling you, start now! The third season ended a few weeks ago and it DID NOT disappoint!

Let's start off with my reasons for LOVING this show.

I'm sorry Tammy and Eric, but you have the best relationship! On a number of occassions, I have thought about basing my own future marriage on yours. Sadly, I am dead serious. And it doesn't help that you are both ridiculously good-looking.

Matt Seracan. I need to find me a man that bases his whole life around the health of his grandmother and is always concerned about her well-being. Nevermind the fact that you were pretty much abandoned by your parents. What 17-year-old kid is mature enough to be QB1 AND the care taker for an 80-year-old woman? Sign me up!

Sorry for the soft porn, but my goodness Tim Riggins! Pretty sure all of my friends decided that we would "give it up" to you. Pretty sure we were all dead serious too. I have come to love your mullet...and I'll just forget about the fact that you are always drunk and have no aspirations of going to college.

Lyla, Lyla, Lyla. You are super annoying but you have come to love Jesus and I can't fault you for that.

Texas forever ya'll! Clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose!

Disneyland!

2009-05-01T10:57:00.007-06:00

This might be the most spontaneous thing I have EVER done...and it was so fun! Kelli's birthday was last Tuesday. We had originally planned to have a bonfire for her until Kimi realized she had two buddy passes that expired on Thursday. Coincidentally, you get into Disneyland free on your birthday which gets you a little badge telling everyone it's your birthday. To make a long story short, we found pretty cheap flights and booked them on Monday night at 11 to leave the next morning at 8AM. Who wouldn't want to spend their birthday in the happiest place ever with the funnest gals ever?

We arrived at DL right as it opened along with the masses.

We rode everything we wanted to, and some things we didn't want to. Jessie was ticked that we went on It's a Small World", a DL staple,

but alas, we survived it.

We had a dog and a churro, and were out of there by 5:30 to catch a flight at 7. We were sad to leave....

but, it was pretty much the best day ever! Happy birthday Kel!

If you need a laugh...

2009-04-30T14:40:00.003-06:00

Go here. She is gonna kill me for this but those of you that know Jess Morrow Gardner will love this. And if you don't know her, I promise she is not slow, just awesome...Rare pics of Jess in her glory days. Sorry but she is probably the coolest girl/bestest friend ever and these pics are proof! Always up for a good time! I have my own set of billybob pics with her that I will save for her birthday next year....Cannot WAIT for you to be home in 3 weeks! Wahoo!

Things that bug

2009-04-29T14:30:00.002-06:00

A few things have happened lately that really chap my hide. What does that even mean anyway? So normally, I consider myself a pretty laid back person. I don't really get stressed or let things bother me. I have come to terms with the fact that people are weird, that they do weird things and I should probably just get over it.....or just laugh at it. Just a few of my random thoughts as of late.

1) Every ward has "special people". I know you all know what I mean by this so I will just leave it at that. I have multiple guys who always IM me on Facebook even though we've never had a conversation in the flesh. Trust me on this one, I am in no way trying to let you know how many guys IM me. They are "special". "How's your day?", "how's work?" It's like we are cyber friends but I don't even know who these people are. Sure, I recognize them at church, so what's the harm in becoming FB friends, right? Sometimes I even pretend like I am my brother hacking into my account so I don't have to talk to these people. They keep asking questions over and over again until you respond. If that green little dot quickly changes to red after you IM someone, take that as your first sign. Does anyone else think this is weird?
2) When people say wuffs instead of wolves...this could totally be my bad and maybe I have been incorrect my whole life, but wuffs? That just sounds weird.
3) When you are at a stoplight and the car next to you is a good 15 feet behind the white line. Is it really necessary to leave all that space? Is there something you can see that I can't?
4) The invasion of personal space. Apparently some people have never learned that there is a one foot diameter around everyone that should never be invaded, unless of course you are invited in.
5) Crocs. The shoes, not the animal. Hideous.
6) Grown men walking around in packs at Disneyland with mouse ears on. They have automatically thrown themselves in the "creepy" category.
7) Two hour meetings that could be over in a half hour if 20 tangents weren't taken. Why must we make them longer than they need to be??
8) Being asked out on a date, through a text. If you are constantly doing this, and I am consistently saying no, stop asking. You've already killed it.
9) Mean girls. Aren't we old enough to get along? Your dirty looks aren't doing you any favors.
10) When guys use girls to get to their friends. We would be more than happy to hook you up if you just want their number. All you have to do is ASK! Heaven forbid, you ask the girl yourself!Maybe it's the first red flag that you can't approach them on your own. I don't know, you decide.

On a side note, I may or may not have gone to Disneyland yesterday, hence #6. Left SLC at 8AM, home in bed at 11PM. The happiest place on earth has never been happier... Details and pics to come!

Top 10 reasons not to go out with someone again

2009-04-14T16:07:00.002-06:00

10) He had a glass eye. Not that there is anything wrong with that but I was never sure where that little wandering eye was looking.
9) He repeatedly tapped his glass eye, thinking it was cool while secretly, I wanted to vomit.
8) He told me that he has been the EQ Pres. twice and he's pretty sure he'll be called again.
7) He picked me up in a ridiculously nice car but proceeds to talk about his "new" car that is much nicer than this. I seriously could have cared less.
6) In the course of an hour, he proceeds to plan our next 10 dates. Bless his heart.
5) He conveniently LOVED everything that I love and wanted to do all of these things on our next 10 dates.
4) He asks if I work out or if I am naturally thin. And then wants to know how often I work out and when was the last time I went.
3) He tells me how his last girlfriend dumped him for an ex-boyfriend. He couldn't believe it because he gave her everything she could have ever wanted and her parents were SO impressed by him! (his exact words.)
2) He LOVES Provo.
1) At one point, this came out of his mouth. "That's okay, we all have hair down there." I don't care who you are, this should NEVER be a conversation starter!!

H.O.P.E.

2009-04-13T16:23:00.004-06:00

One of my best friend's world is changing.

Within a two week span, EVERYTHING that she knew will forever be different.

This turn of events has made me think a lot. About how we take our everyday lives for granted and the people in them. About how getting up in the morning and going about our days is something we should be grateful for. Not only do I love her, but I LOVE her parents and I can't help but wonder what the future holds.

The strength and attitude of this family is something to live for. When she broke the news to me, SHE was the one comforting me and telling me everything was going to be okay and that it was just "part of the plan". I can't help feeling a little silly because SHE had to reassure ME about something I already knew. Ironically, it should have been the other way around. That shows the kind of strength and spirit she has.

My mind has been flooded with memories of my time in their home.

Their house was a second home for me and I will forever be grateful for the kindness and generosity they have offered me. I single handedly drank most of their milk, ate most of their candy in the "drawer", and ALWAYS felt welcome there. Between the road trips and late nights at their house, I dare say that THEY were definitely the coolest parents around. Parents that you wanted to hang out with, because they were seriously that cool.

In times of trial, our FAITH is the only thing that holds us up. It's times like these that define who we are and what we are made of.

If anyone can fight this, HE can. It's in his nature. He won't go quietly. I have no doubt about that.

Elder Ballard said it best.

"My message to you today, my brothers and sisters, is simply this: the Lord is in control. He knows the end from the beginning. He has given us adequate instruction that, if followed, will see us safely through any crisis. His purposes will be fulfilled, and someday we will understand the eternal reasons for all of these events. Therefore, today we must be careful to not overreact, nor should we be caught up in extreme preparations; but what we must do is keep the commandments of God and never lose hope!
Faith in God and in His Son, Jesus Christ, is absolutely essential for us to maintain a balanced perspective through times of trial and difficulty. Remember, nothing will occur in our lives that He does not understand. Alma taught, “And he shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people.”
As the end of the Savior’s mortal ministry drew near, He offered this reassuring hope to His beloved disciples: “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”

My prayers are with you...

What a cutie.

2009-04-01T16:03:00.002-06:00

So, remember this little guy??

He has now turned into this little guy..

TGIF

2009-03-27T15:10:00.003-06:00

On my lovely Friday, I had to lay six people off. That's right, six.

By 11AM, I had already downed a coke and several advil. Between the tears, the dirty looks, and the if-I-don't-make-eye-contact-then-maybe-its-not-me looks I got around the office, I needed it.

How was your friday??

Oops!!

2009-03-26T10:58:00.003-06:00

Yesterday I realized it that it was almost the end of the month and I still hadn't contacted my girls for visiting teaching. I got new girls and a new partner this month so we decided that I would contact them and she would prepare a little lesson. Out of the three that we now visit, I have met one, and don't know the other two. And, based on previous experience, I've learned that people respond to a text message better than a voicemail. Keep in mind that I have never seen these girls in RS or Sacrament meeting so I don't know how active they are.

So, I started to text one of them. Her name is Sayward. My text said something like this:

"Hi Sayward! This is Alli and I am your new visiting teacher. Melinda and I were wondering if there is a time we can stop by and see you this week. Let me know what works best for you!"

After I sent it, I looked at the message again and didn't realize what that sneaky little predictive text had done. This is what was actually sent.

"Hi Wayward! This is Alli and I am your new visiting teacher. Melinda and I were wondering if there is a time we can stop by and see you this week. Let me know what works best for you!"

Wayward!! I think that is the WORST possible thing to send to someone that might be on the verge of inactivity! I didn't know if I should send something else apologizing or just hope that she might realize that on an iPhone, the "S" and "W" are right by each other on the keyboard. I chose the latter.

Needless to say, she never responded. Chalk one up for me being an idiot.

Can you imagine??

2009-03-16T11:16:00.004-06:00

This my friends, is Kimi. Kimi had a brilliant idea on Friday which led us to Idaho Falls on Saturday at 7AM. Why, you ask? Oh, only to try out for the greatest show ever, The Amazing Race. I have been a fan of the show for a while and would pretty much die if I could be on it. The best thing about this "reality show" is that it isn't mean and degrading like the other shows out there. You don't get voted off for being weird or ugly. It is truly a race around the world and the best part is that you win 1 million dollars if you come in first!

The auditions were at a random Hampton Inn in IF and as we sat and waited with the other 40 couples trying out, Kimi and I were trying to fill out our applications. You have to write things about your partner like what you like, dislike, your pet peeves and what famous person you think you look like and who others think you look like. We were dying laughing as we were coming up with things for each other. We decided that I was stubborn and don't explain things well and that Kimi is flaky and doesn't listen to me. Our famous people were classic. I put that someone once thought I looked like Gisele Buncheon (a crazy lady in Soho) and Kimi put Estelle Getty. Not sure where that came from... What a pair they would make!

In turn, we had to do it for each other too, so I said that Kimi reminded me of Bette Midler and she said that I was Kelly Kapowski. Another classic pair.

After our two minutes in front of the camera and a drive by the Titantic museum (how random is that??), we made our way back to SL. Now it's just a waiting game...

I did become a little nervous as I was watching the show last night and one of the roadblocks was running a mile and a half in your underwear..Can you imagine the looks that we would get running down the street, sporting the g-force???

Seriously though, what would we do??? It REALLY made me nervous.

Let's talk about this...

2009-03-16T11:04:00.003-06:00

So every Monday and Wednesday, I get the fun opportunity to go and tutor two little boys at Midvale Elementary. Gustavo is my first grader and Chris is my fourth grader. They have really become my little buddies and I look forward to reading with them each week. We read all kinds of books and I try to find things that they are interested in reading. With Gustavo, his reading level is lower so most of his books are about stupid things. Today, we read a book called Getting a Haircut. Not the most exciting book but it has the words that he needs to practice. As we were learning about a little girl and her day at the beautyshop, Gustavo seemed pretty uninterested. Then, we turned to the last page and I about died. See below.

I'm not sure we should be promoting mullets in the books that we let our kids read. This led to a very serious discussion about what a mullet is. I told Gustavo that they were gross and that even though they may be very popular in his culture, he should never have one. I made him pinky swear and I'm pretty sure I made my point. Just to be sure, we went over it again at the end of the lesson. Looks like dad needs a haircut too.

Donovan & GJ

2009-03-10T11:24:00.003-06:00

Last night, I had the chance to go see these guys at the Depot. Both were looking super homeless but super attractive too which is all a little bit ironical. I don't know what it is about a guy and a guitar. He could be the ugliest guy in town but as soon as he starts singin', I'm a goner.

I honestly could have gone strictly to people watch. To be honest, I felt a little out of my element. A little different scene than FHE that we usually make an appearance at on Mondee nights. Between the 50-year-old drunk guys and the 40-year-old woman smoking pot next to us, we probably totally stuck out. And you should have seen the look on the bartender's face when I ordered a DC. Pretty sure we were the only ones there who weren't throwin' a few back. Regardless, it was a great show and was worth my hair smelling neat today because of my lack of time to wash it this morning.

Diaper Boy

2009-03-06T12:19:00.003-07:00

I absolutely LOVE stories like this.

I wonder if he woke up and thought, "today I think I'll put on an adult-sized diaper, drive around til I find some kids, then pull my pants down to show them that I, a 31-year-old man, am wearing a diaper. Yeah....that sounds like fun."

What a weirdo.

Is THAT the reason why we are still single??

2009-03-04T11:27:00.004-07:00

Let me paint a picture...It's a Saturday afternoon. Kelli(my VT coordinator AND friend) and I have been at the ward for 4 hours trying to split the RS and make new assignments for everyone. We sit in the clerk's office with a creepy heater that talks to us yet doesn't produce an ounce of heat. For weeks, we had planned on going sledding with a bunch of peeps and it was all supposed to go down that night. As we huddled around the computer, the feeling in our fingers left. We made an executive decision and decided that sledding was the LAST thing we wanted to do. We opted for dinner and movie instead.

We met at Kelli's house, 6 gals and the 2 guys we talked into hanging out with us. 4 out of the 6 gals had hats on which usually means one thing. We were showerless. To confirm it, I asked everyone to raise a hand if they hadn't showered that day. All hands went up. As we all started to laugh, the look on the boys' faces said it all...It was like they were totally disgusted but didn't want to be rude and say anything. All I'm saying is that it takes time and when you have no set plans...really, why would you? I won't mention someone in particular who hadn't showered on Friday either...shockingly, it wasn't me. The boys claim that they shower because it makes them feel good. My response to that is, not as good as my pj's at 3PM on a Saturday afternoon.

Maybe THAT is why we are still single...just a thought.

As a sidenote: I must say that you were all looking fabulous for not showering. At least we know how to hide it!

And, just incase you didn't know it, Jesus does love you.

Funniness

2009-03-02T10:34:00.003-07:00

Aren't families the best? Obviously I am a bit biased, but my family in particular is pretty great. I love, love, love being able to spend Sunday afternoon/nights with my family. Sunday is no longer a relaxing day for me so by the time I pull up at about 4:45, I am more than ready to eat, take a little catnap, and see what we can come up with for a treat. My dad is probably the funniest man alive and him, along with other funnies make Sunday nights always unpredictable. This particular conversation will go down in the books. Poor Vel(my grandma), had to be a witness to the whole thing.

It started out by talking about bidets. My dad was saying that when he builds a house, he has got to have one. With the help of google, we discovered that $1700 can get you a pretty sweet one including a little bonus, the heated seat. Dream come true... This led to a conversation about his first experience with a bidet in Europe. He was sold the first time he used one. Then my mom chimed in with her first experience. She was in Europe and somehow thought it was for washing your feet. Not sure how you would come to that conclusion. This reminded me of one of my favorite stories about my mom. Picture her as a pre-pubescent teen, traveling with her school on a bus across the country. She somehow thought that if you were "horny", that meant you felt sick. She proceeded to tell a boy on the bus that she couldn't help it but she was "horny". Bless her little heart...

Anyhoo, this led to Mike saying that 1) he never uses a public bathroom and 2) he uses baby wipes instead of tp. What?? Do people really do that? I mean, honestly, it sounds delightful but it has never crossed my mind. He told me that once I try it, I will never go back. Pretty sure he might be right on this one.

ThAT led to the topic of men vs. women's plumbing. I won't go into details but let's just say that I learned way more than I ever wanted to about anyone in my family. This whole time, my poor grandma is sitting on the couch, speechless. She asked my dad to take her home right after.

We then proceeded to watch Ghosttown with a little girl scout cookie ice cream. Nothing like some good laughs to start out the week.

** I stand corrected. I just learned from the lovely Wikipedia that with a bidet, you can wash your feet but that it is also sometimes mistaken for a drinking fountain. sick. For more details and a little laugh, click here.

Have you heard the news??

2009-02-27T11:51:00.002-07:00

I just got super excited because I found out that this is really happening. I have heard rumors swirling for months and I can now sleep at night because it's been confirmed. If you haven't seen the show, I would highly recommend renting the three seasons that are available. I assure you....you will not be disappointed.

Confessions

2009-02-23T12:26:00.005-07:00

So, maybe I set my alarm an hour earlier than I usually get up so that I could hear Jillian from the Bachelor on 97.1. I usually don't see the light of day any earlier than 7:30 but today was a special exception. I love her and she DID NOT disappoint! I decided that if we knew each other in real life, we would totally be friends...

Second, my friend Jayna had a dessert party on Saturday night. I went to the gym that morning and decided that I would work out for an extra hour so I could eat til my little heart was content later that night. I think I went back for seconds 6-7 times so I'm not sure that my extra efforts were worth anything. We were all sitting around the table chatting when a little favorite of mine popped up on Jayna's IPod. Hold On by Wilson Phillips. A classic for any girl (0r guy for that matter) that grew up in the early 90's. Immediately, we all started singing in unison. Before we knew it, we could no longer hear the delectable sounds of Carnie, Wendy and Chynna. We suddenly split into a 2-part harmony and I'd be lying if I said there wasn't a little tear in my eye. Who knew we could all sound so good?? I'm in band so I wasn't surprised by my own vocals but the rest of those closet singers were NOT messing around!

This led to a conversation about how we could sing this in Relief Society and get away with it. Listen to the words...it could TOTALLY be gospel related, ESPECIALLY in a singles ward. Our little minds were churning and if you know my ward, anything goes, so I seriously don't see it causing a problem. Sadly, there is probably a small percentage of girls who have never heard of the WP. They should be shot. Some classic tunes came from those girls and you can thank me later for giving you a little sample below. I do need a musical number for RS in a few weeks so warm up your vocals girls!

**If you didn't catch my sarcasm, yes, I am in a band, and no we are not good, even though we are called "The Goods". Our Christmas album was nothing short of fantastic though and we are currently in the studio recording a "pop" album. More details to come.

Hello Lionel.

2009-02-20T11:49:00.004-07:00

If you haven't seen this music video, you don't know what you're missing. Watch it. It is worth the 5 minutes and 27 seconds. It is a real shame that they don't make em like they used to.

A few observations:

1: A blind person's eyes don't look like that.
2: It seems unlikely that she would be able to dance AND do pottery as a blind person. I'm just sayin'.
3: It's official. Lionel is creepy.

Funny things

2009-02-19T12:33:00.004-07:00

I was thinking of funny things yesterday. You know, things that will always be funny, no matter how much time passes or how old you are. My friend Dave posted this picture on his FB account and whenever I need a laugh, I always come back to this. Single-handedly the greatest pic ever.

There are a lot of things about this picture that make it so great.

1. The resthome. I'm sure Dave was just trying to do his civic duty and give back to the community with a little musical cheer.
2. He must not be very good, judging by the look on their faces.
3. The lady on the far left has apparently "passed".
4. The lady on the far right is pained by whatever Dave is singing.
5. There is a strange yellow liquid on the table which has a strong resemblance to urine.
6. Dave is just singing away. Bless his heart.

PS: Have you ever noticed that you can seriously say ANYTHING about anyone, good or bad, and if you say, "bless his/her heart" after, it makes it okay? Here are some examples:

"He is such a loser. Bless his heart."
"Poor guy couldn't get a date no matter how hard he tried. Bless his heart."
"She has SERIOUS issues. Bless her heart."

Works every time.

Valentines in SV

2009-02-18T16:50:00.008-07:00

Some friends and I decided to take a little weekend getaway to Sun Valley last week. We were having a blast sporting some 1980's snowsuits that we found at Sun Valley's version of the DI, The Gold Mine. I think we went there twice a day for various items. I am telling you, my snowsuit was made for my body! Not only did I wear it for 3 straight days, but I wanted to sleep in it too. It even came with a mysterious stain in the bum area....never looked too closely to determine what it was but I think we all know. See below.

All was well until we decided to go sledding on the last day. The hill looked a little freaky and it was full of bumps. Let's be honest though, we really just needed another excuse to wear our one-piecers. We were there for about 20 minutes when Monique decided to get crazy. Last thing I saw was her flying down the mountain. At one point she got about 3 feet of air. We were dying laughing until she stopped and we realized she was hurt. This is the scene right after the incident. She couldn't get up but was kind enough to let me take a picture. I told her she would thank me later.

This is cute little Kelli pulling her to the car

She thought she broke her tailbone so we decided to take a trip to the ER to check it out. Don't mind us looking homeless.

The bad news is that she had to spend a few hours in the ER and get a shot in the rear. And that little compression fracture she got in her lower back. The good news is that she got all drugged up and has to use a walker for 4-6 weeks...She was laughing just as hard as we were so I don't feel so bad. It certainly makes a good story.

And on the way home, we bought ourselves a little Valentines Gift at the Flying J. A sweet pink t-shirt with a buck on the whole front side. On top of the buck in some sweet writing it says, "this babe bags bucks". You better believe we do. I'll have to post a pic of that later.

**Our celeb siting for the week was Jodi Foster up in the village. This was our conversation after we heard the sales lady ask her if she was Jodi Foster.

Alli: "Oh my gosh, that is Jodi Foster."
Kelli: "Oh jeez, what should we do?"

We just stood there as she walked out of the store. We are nerds.

Brilliant..

2009-02-13T11:01:00.003-07:00

A couple of nights ago, I had the chance to go down and volunteer at the homeless shelter. I have never been there before and it was a sobering experience. We got to decorate Valentine's cookies and make Valentine's boxes with the kids. I just wanted to take this cute little girl, Janessa, home with me. When we asked her what she wanted on her box, she specified Doritos. It actually makes perfect sense. Walking around that classroom passing out your V-day cards is tiring! And there is nothing like a little dorito pick-me-up if you will. She was absolutely adorable and it was hard walking out the doors, leaving her in that horrible place.

As a side note, she wanted to make another box for her 3-year-old brother, Angel. Her one request for this box? A midget. She saw "a little man" at the park the other day and was intrigued. We thought maybe she saw a little boy but she was POSITIVE it was a man. Her request was granted. Sadly, I forgot to take a picture of how that turned out.

The Nerve.

2009-02-11T15:41:00.000-07:00

Warning: Fake names will be used to protect the innocent or not-so-innocent characters in this story.

So, I have a story about two "friends". We'll call them Suzie and Tom. Suzie and Tom had been friends for a good 5 or 6 years. They dated about 3 years ago and it wasn't really going anywhere so they amicably went their separate ways. A few years later, they ended up being in the same ward again. Tom just got out of a really bad relationship and was looking for a new beginning. Suzie agreed to go out with Tom because she knew that they always had a good time together.

One thing led to another and they were back on again. They spent their winter weekends away trying to escape the SL smog for the SG sun. They had a lot of fun together but Suzie just couldn't get Tom to commit. Tom was quite the sweet talker and always had a good excuse for why he was acting a certain way. He would always blame Suzie for his actions and she always ended up apologizing for something that wasn't her fault. Their relationship was moving at a snail's pace but Suzie always had a lot of fun with Tom so she decided to hold out. Winter turned to spring which later turned to summer. One night, Tom and Suzie decided to go golfing. As they went back to the restaurant where they left Tom's car, they ran into Tom's X, Jill. Suzie and Jill didn't know each other so Tom introduced them. While Suzie sat waiting in the car, Tom and Jill got in a huge argument in the parking lot. Suzie felt awkward so decided to leave. Tom assured her that he would only be a few minutes and would come to Suzie's house.

When Tom arrived, he had a great story of why they were fighting. He defended Suzie to Jill and told her told her that Jill was crazy and couldn't get over him. The next day Suzie found out what really happened. Apparently Tom had proposed to Jill a few days before so naturally, she was pissed when she saw him with Suzie. Tom had no plans of telling Suzie about this. I guess he needed her as a backup just incase Jill said no. Tom told Jill that Suzie was the wedding planner and that is why they were together. That's right, folks. Suzie was dating a lying, manipulative loser and didn't even know it.

When Suzie found out, she tried to confront Tom. He responded or should I say didn't respond by not calling her back....ever. Suzie found it disturbing that after all these years of friendship, he didn't even have the decency to give her an explanation. Fast forward 4 months. Tom and Jill are supposed to get married and they call it off on the day of the wedding. Karma's a bitch.

Tom ends up coming back to Suzie's ward and avoids her like the plague. This continues for months. To make matters worse, they both have callings which requires them to work together. Tom avoids her at church but constantly IM's her wanting to hang out again. Suzie avoids all contact with Tom because he acts like nothing ever happened and he has NEVER apologized about any of it. He asks her out and she just ignores him, hoping that he one day will get the hint.

This just in. Keep in mind, Tom and Suzie haven't spoken in over 6 months. Tom IM's Suzie to say hi. She figures that she should finally just be nice since it's harder trying to avoid him all the time. Then Tom says this: "Sounds like you have plans but I was just going to see if you wanted to come to NY this weekend with my family." Excuse me....did Suzie read this correctly?? Yes, indeed she did. After putting her through hell, he does this?? Like everything will just go back to normal?? Suzie is baffled and gracefully declines. She'd have to be a COMPLETE idiot to go back to that. The nerve I tell ya, the nerve.

Who knows? Tom's sister is getting married and maybe he wanted Suzie to come discuss wedding plans. Seeing that she is a wedding planner and all...

** this story was not stolen from a Lifetime Original script and it may or may not be about me. try that on for size. my life is awesome.

It is true...I am vain.

2009-02-11T15:13:00.000-07:00

Have you ever seen someone you used to know along time ago and you used to think they were really good-looking? Lately I find myself finding some old pals via facebook, blogs, etc. This is so horrible but with many peeps I have actually said in my mind, "geez, time has not been good to them. Good thing we didn't end up together." Seriously?? I am that shallow?? Whose to say that someone hasn't come across my picture and thought the same thing??

It is sad that society has this control over our minds of how someone should look and act. If you aren't a size 2, you aren't beautiful. If you don't have the cutest, trendiest clothes, you are a loser. I have totally bought into this and am more concerned with my self image(and apparently others), than I should be.

It's just too damn bad that we all can't grow old and fat together and embrace it. I was going to put some pictures of the unfortunate victims up but then I feared for the day they found my blog and felt really bad...

Dilemma.

2009-01-26T17:34:00.000-07:00

Question.
What do you do when you have to go straight to tap from work, and don't have time to go home and get the underwear you need to get your dance on?

Answer.
You go without.

PS- for anyone who read my previous tap post about the lady with no bra, you know that underwear is optional. Because of that, I feel good about what I am about to do.

Wish me luck!

Seriously??

2009-01-21T12:33:00.000-07:00

So, I know you are all shocked because I just posted but the sickest thing happened this morning and I think it's pretty blog worthy. So I tutor a couple of kids at Midvale Elementary a few times a week and I was there this morning with my little
1st grader Gustavo. We were sitting outside the classroom doing some reading when another little boy walks out who obviously isn't feeling well. He was with a teacher and she was holding a garbage can. I quickly put two and two together and realized that this kid was going to blow chunks.

I started to panic because I don't do well with throw up. How I am going to have children, not sure. Anyhoo, the teacher proceeds to stop with the kid ONE FOOT behind the desk I was sitting at and is coaching him so he can make it into the garbage can. At this point, I am sweating. And poor little Gustavo. Probably didn't understand why I was rushing him through his book and yelling at him when he wasn't getting a word right. That little book could not end fast enough. No offense, little man. When the kid started to dry heave, so did I, and I had had enough. I rushed Gustavo back to his classroom while I ran around the corner. Don't think I didn't give that teacher the biggest crusty ever as I ran by her! Why would you not take the kid to the bathroom?? Does she not understand that some people have NO tolerance for throw up? And the poor kid! Who wants to throw up in a hallway while others are passing by? I am telling you, if he would have, I would have too, no matter how empty my stomach was. And then we would have had a situation.

An oldie but a goodie.

2009-01-16T11:56:00.000-07:00

I wish I had a pic to go along with this next one because words can't describe what a pic can show. We were celebrating my birth a few weeks ago with my extended family and my dad brought up a story that was totally blog worthy. My cousin-in-law Lindsey even asked why I hadn't blogged about this, so Linds, this is for you.

I'm going to start out by warning you about the Flying J in Nephi. Apparently all the creepos hang out there and this story is just a glimpse of what I have seen take place. Gas stations aren't usually the classiest joints but you definitely see all kinds there. Case in point. We were coming back from our annual Powell trip with the Haths. I wasn't looking my best as I had been on the lake for 7 days and if you know me at all, you know I don't shower too often at the lake. We were on the homebound stretch, and made our last stop in Nephi to fill up. I ran in do use the bathroom and get a little treat. I was standing in line with Brooke when it happened. In walks a trucker that was probably the creepiest man I have ever seen. He gets in line behind me and whispers this in my ear...

"I'll make you a deal. You give me a smile and I won't tickle you."

What?!?!? I have never been so creeped out in my life! I casually laughed but secretly wanted to cry. Meanwhile, what looks like his granddaughter, walks in to say something to him. He proceeds to yell and swear and this little girl while winking at me. Brooke kindly waited for me so that I that I wasn't taken out back and molested. Not sure if I have ever thanked her for that, so thank you Brooke!

Lizzie's married!!

2009-01-16T11:33:00.000-07:00

I know, I know...I have been a serious slacker on the blog lately. I'm sure my 4-5 readers are utterly distraught. In all honesty, my life has not been to exciting as of late, so there hasn't been too much to say. I regret to inform you all that Liz got married on Wednesday so LizandAlli and become just Alli...She is sooo happy though! Once again, another bites the dust. She looked lovely and classy as always. That's just a Kennedy standard.

WT

2008-12-01T15:51:00.000-07:00

For me, the Thanksgiving shootout is pretty much the same every year. This year was no different. Another early elimination means another seductive gun photo shoot... if only you could see the collection of "gun" photos Mike and I have taken over the years. That is for another post. On a positive note, we did bring home a victory! Thank you Chris.

Looks like someone got a new shotgun...

2008-11-26T15:16:00.000-07:00

It's happening again, the annual Reeses Cup...and I'm pretty sure that the Parkridge Stews are takin' it home this year. This, by far, is the most WT thing my family does (besides Ads and Brooke's WT BBQ that is held every summer) but it has been a tradition and will continue for generations to come. There is nothing better than family, guns, and the mysterious things we find in the field out on 5500 South and as far west as you can get.

Pictures will be coming after the defeat. Wish us luck!

And, although it may look like it in this picture, my brother is not handi..

Happy Thanksgiving!

For the love...

2008-11-13T09:49:00.000-07:00

The Pregnant Man Is Pregnant Again!

WILL SOMEONE PLEASE TELL THEM TO STOP??

So gross...

Greatest show ever...

2008-11-12T14:08:00.000-07:00

Okay, I hope you have all seen this 1987 classic at some point in your life. If not, you were deprived as a child. I had to run to my parents and watch Luke for a bit while my mom went to the doctor's. He was asleep so I started channel surfing. Lo and behold, this little gem of a show happened to be on so I caught the last 45 minutes of it. Dare I say, it might be my favorite movie and it gets better every time you watch it. A couple of things to note:
a) we used to watch this all the time as kids and now when I watch it, I realize things that I didn't as a child. It's all about sex AND Hollywood is a nasty, gay man. Apparently, Di and Rich figured we wouldn't know what they were talking about, which we didn't.
b) whoever thought of the storyline is genius..A stock boy falls in love with a mannequin that comes to life at night?? Are you serious? At this point in my life, I appreciate these awesome 80's storylines. The only thing comparable today is "Snakes on a Plane". Although I haven't seen it, I doubt it holds a candle to Mannequin.
c) Roxy's hair is awesome..She is sporting a bun and ponytail all in one. Who can pull that off? Only Roxy.
d) In the end, they get married in a mall window, ceremony performed by Hollywood. It doesn't get any better than that.
e) Kim Cattrell has never looked better. You know this show was a resume booster for her.

If you don't know what I am talking about, this is a MUST SEE!

And in doing some research online, I found that there is a Mannequin 2. Any takers?

Enough is enough

2008-11-04T09:38:00.000-07:00

About five years ago, I started taking a tap class. My mom started before me with a bunch of her friends and she eventually talked me into it. I am so glad that she did cause I think it is honestly the highlight of my life up until this point. Is that sad? Anyhoo, when I started, I got a bunch of friends to do it with me. Little by little, each one dropped out for various reasons. I am the only one that is still going strong and as a result, am in a class where I am the youngest by at least 30 years. They are awesome ladies though and they can move like you wouldn't believe! Now to my point. When I switched to this class, I noticed a particular woman who apparently doesn't like to wear a bra. Now I can think of many reasons why at almost 60 years old you should be wearing a bra.

1) Your boobs aren't as perky as they used to be and may hang a little normal than lower
2) You are freaking TAPPING, which involves a lot of JUMPING. Nuf said.

I have often thought of why on earth this woman wouldn't wear a bra. You would think that support would be a priority for her but time and time again, as she stands behind me, I can't help but look in the mirror at her "free boobs" and throw up in my mouth a little bit.

Last night was seriously the breaking point. When I walked in, she had a jacket on, seeing as the weather is getting a little colder. As we started to warm up, she took her jacket off and I witnessed something that I never want to see again. Not only was she not wearing a bra, but she was wearing a nude colored tee that was COMPLETELY see through! Are you kidding me?? The bouncing was bad enough but now she is adding nipples to the equation! Sorry for being so graphic but I seriously am considering switching classes. It's not as if she can't see herself in the mirror as well! Needless to say, I was completely disgusted and am not looking forward to next Monday night. The only other option now is going topless and since we've all seen it all anyway, what's stopping her??

I just needed to vent. And just be glad there isn't a photo.

Always good to be reminded...

2008-10-23T12:44:00.000-06:00

"When you're unsure of yourself, when you start pulling back into doubt and small living, she's the one inside saying, 'Get up from there and live like the glorious girl you are.' She's the power in you."

I needed this..

My Lizzie Loo is getting Married!!

2008-10-23T12:39:00.000-06:00

Not that Liz has been a big contributer to the blog in the last year but I am happy to say that she just got engaged to a great guy! I couldn't be happier for her! If anything, maybe people will stop wondering who my "friend" Liz is. Just wanted to say congrats to the happy couple!

The "Voo"

2008-09-17T16:34:00.001-06:00

This trip was actually over Labor Day but it has just taken me a while to post my pics. My ward, yes, I said my singles ward, went to Nauvoo over Labor Day. Can I just say that it was 5 fun-lovin' days of church sites, long bus rides, the most disgusting food I have ever eaten, sick hotels(especially the Super 8 somewhere in Wyoming complete with stained sheets and hair, not our hair, on the shower wall), and lots of interesting peeps. Let's just say that if you don't like FHE in a singles ward, this trip would not have been for you. And can I just say that if my good friend Brookie wouldn't have been there, I may have been suicidal. Enjoy the pics!

The freaky Community of Christ/RLDS temple in Independence Missouri- pronounced Mi-sur-a
Little known fact- the Visitors Center is actually built around the jail, the exsiting jail isn't there except for the original floor. A replica has been built.
Adam-Ondi-Ahman - not much there...yet.

The first of many disgusting meals.
The view from the Nauvoo temple overlooking the Mississippi River

All of the cute Sr. Missionaries put on a musical that was straight of "Waiting for Guffman". Brooke and I were dying the whole time and in honor, we had to show some guns and give our best dead swan.
The view from the grove where JS used to preach.

Unfortunately my camera died a few days before we came home so some sites weren't documented. Overall, good times were had by all and the memories made were priceless.

Weekend at the drive-in

2008-08-11T10:41:00.000-06:00

Who doesn't love a good weekend at the drive-in?? I don't know if there is anything better than putting a lovesac in the back of a truck and piling a bunch of peeps in there. Liz was kind enough to venture up from Provo to enjoy the flick with us. We prayed for no rain and besides a few sprinkles, it was a fabulous night..

This, my friends, is Toby. He will making more frequent appearances on the blog. Although it looks like we just woke up, we just thought we would take a post movie pic at 1AM.

Ally B. becomes Ally N!

2008-07-28T09:44:00.000-06:00

One of my dearest Ally Baldwin got married a little over a week ago and so the last few weeks have been nothing but a party! Al and I have been through a lot together and even though she hasn't lived in SL for the last 3 years, I am so glad that we have remained such good friends! She's currently living in Boston so we had to cram everything in the two weeks she was in town. Overall, it was such a fun day and she looked so happy and beautiful. I wish I took more pictures but here is just a little glimpse...

Congratulations Brian & Ally! And thanks to John and Di for throwing a heck of a party!

What gives???

2008-06-16T10:18:00.000-06:00

This weekend, I had two interesting experiences that left me having a bit of an identity crisis. For those that haven't heard, I was recently called to be the Relief Society Pres. in my ward. I know what you are thinking... "you, the relief society president??". Believe me, I was just as surprised as all of you. I met with the old pres. last week and she completely overwhelmed me with everything that I have to do! So needless to say, Friday night was spent trying to get organized and preparing the talk that I had to give in Sacrament meeting. As I was sitting at the kitchen table, typing away, Janice (my roomie) came home from a date. She brought the guy in and I was getting the vibe that she didn't want him to stay so I didn't offer to leave. She walked outside with him where he proceeded to tell her that he was glad he wasn't struck down in my presence. WTF?? What the hell does that mean?? I talked to him for all of about 3 minutes, and not once did it come up what I was doing. Maybe he just thought I was a loser for doing it on a Friday night. I have never considered myself as a molly mormon but maybe I'm completely wrong. Jan and I got a good laugh from it.
The next morning, Jan and I went to look at a house she was interested in buying. As we walked through the house with the real estate agent, she was making small talk with me and asked me who was going to live there. I told her it would just be Janice and I. She then asked if we were married. Not realizing that she was asking if WE were married to each other, I casually said no and then I figured out what she meant. I quickly clarified that we were both single, FRIENDS, and just looking for a new place to live. Within 12 hours I was accused of being a molly and lesbian. What gives?? Apparently I need to change my look...

Happy Birthday to my dear Elissa...

2008-05-16T14:44:00.001-06:00

Today is Elissa's birthday so I (Liz isn't here but I know she would echo me) wanted to thank her for being the best and give all of YOU 27 reasons why WE love her.

1) Elissa, hands down, will do anything for anyone at anytime.
2) She is the best sister to her siblings and best daughter to her parents.
3) She secretly has a dirty side to her.
4) She struggles with her job but I bet she is the best damn teacher at her school.
5) She is so supportive of the people in her life.
6) She shares my love of Mocha ice cream.
7) I think she was the best relief society pres. in the history of presidents. She ALWAYS gave 110%.
8) She looks for the good in everyone.
9) She came to my grandpa's funeral by herself. She'll never know how much that meant to me.
10) She has a wicked tennis swing.
11) Her style. Nuff said.
12) Her patience. God blessed her with way more than I could ever have.
13) Elissa is very wise. I can think of several occassions where something that she said has stuck with me.
14) Her sense of humor. Every once in a while she'll whip out a hum-dinger that makes us laugh for hours on end.
15) Her knowledge of the gospel. She continues to amaze me with how much she knows.
16) She is a packrat. If you've seen Elissa's room, you know what I am talking about. I know...you would never guess that about her.
17)Her love of the Utes. She will be a diehard fan until the day she dies.
18) Her generosity. She always seems to have an extra ticket for me to some sort of event.
19) We have traveled the country together and I can't think of anyone else I would rather do it with.
20) She is a great listener. Whenever I need to vent, she lets me do it and gives great advice.
21) Her testimony. Talk about a rock!
22) Elissa LOVES the temple. It is not unusual for her to be there at least once a week. What a great example she has been to me!
23) She is always up for a good skinny dip. Even in her own backyard.
24) Elissa is friends with everyone! I have yet to meet someone that knows her and doesn't love her!
25) She can mingle with people like its nobody's business. I can think of countless families that would die to have Elissa as a part of their own.
26) Her diligence to say she is going to do something and follow through with it. Not an ounce of flakiness in her.
27) And last but not least, her friendship! She came into my life at a pivitol time and I couldn't be more grateful for that! I love you Lis!

New York, New York

2008-04-22T11:31:00.000-06:00

Last week I went with my mom, Brooke and the Hathaway gals to New York for a long weekend. Now, when you go to NY, it's not a really a vacation. Our days consisted of waking up at 7AM, walking about 10 miles a day so that we could fit everything in, and coming home at 10 to crash. We squeezed in a bunch of stuff though and had some good laughs along the way. Thanks for the trip, mom!

The crew

On the subway

Times Square

Empire State Building

After a day of shopping in SoHo

Me, Adrien, Lars

L-O-V-E

Brooke and I doing our Busath vs. Jay Lynn photo shoot

The most touristy thing you can do...riding on top of bus around the city. It was 50 degrees and freezing but we got to see the ghetto. For shizzle my nizzle...

The Luke

2008-04-16T10:28:00.000-06:00

I'm sorry, but is this not the cutest kid ever?? This is a shoutout to my nephew Luke, aka "the Luke". Holla!!

i miss alli...

2008-03-20T13:19:00.001-06:00

yes i am in brazil...and yes i am stuck in an office where i am currently doing nothing. which is why i had time to reminisce about how much i miss alli. no really she is probably not even realizing i am gone because of her new boyfriend. wait, did i announce that? ha ha--dont you miss me already???

I've been....tagged

2008-02-27T10:58:00.001-07:00

Thanks, Ange!

Ten years ago:
I was a junior in high school, had just barely moved away from SugarHouse and hated my parents for doing that to my social life but had a crush on all the new boys in my ward.

5 things on my to do list today:
1. Finish work
2. Go to the gym
3. wash my car
4. tivo American Idol
5. Meet/approve of ally's bf from boston

What would I do if I suddenly had a billion dollars:
1. Pay off debt
2. Take my parents all over Europe
3. Start a humanitarian organization
4. Shopping...let's be honest...lots of shopping
5. Travel

3 of my bad habits:
1. Looking at my split ends
2. slouching
3. not drinking enough water

Jobs I have had:
Zuka Juice
Deseret Book
PA for my dad
Marketing Assistant
HR Manager

5 things people don't know about me:
1. I take tap
2. I love be independant and it's going to take someone fabulous to give that up
3. I love dogs, especially mine, more than people
4. I am either shy or not at all
5. I don't want any daughters, only boys

Snacks I enjoy:
1. cherry chocolates in hot chocolate
2. Ants on a Log
3. chocolate milk
4. Dunford donuts

5 shows I like to watch:
1. The Office
2. The Hills
3. Gossip Girl
4. Rob & Big (by far, the funniest show on TV)
5. Snapped

Places I've vacationed:
California, Lake Powell, DC, New York, Hawaii, Peru

5 things I want to learn:
1. How to cook
2. How to be crafty
3. How to drive without having road rage
4. How to play the harp
5. Selflessness

Serious struggles

2008-02-21T12:50:00.000-07:00

So....I'm not the strongest girl I know. This was totally magnified when Liz and I were stranded out in the middle of a field because we couldn't start the effing snowmobile. Here is a hint of what this little adventure was like...this happened about 5 times! You'd think that we would learn to constantly give it a little gas to save us from the hell we endured. Sometimes we never learn...

Wyoming Wonderland

2008-02-21T12:24:00.000-07:00

The whole crew

Liz and I were fortunate enough to spend President's Day in Star Valley, and let me just tell you, it was one of the most pleasant weekends I've had in a while. Couldn't have asked for better company, food and all around good times. In previous trips, we have invited super random people and although this trip's randomness was similiar, all our peeps bonded! Hopefully there will be more trips to come! Here are a few pics from the trip!

Liz and I at lunch before we went shopping for mass amounts of food that were consumed throughout the weekend.

The crew at breakfast one morning

A harmless game of "I've never". Let me just say that I was so fascinated by the things that people had done. I guess they weren't as innocent as I thought!

The gals!

So...I became slightly obsessed with Bruiser and Zoe while we were...parting was hard.

Heading out for a little ride

A bunch of us at the "love cabin".

I think by the end of the trip, we all wanted to be adopted by the Kennedy's! Thanks for good times, Liz!

Come on folks....have some class

2008-02-20T14:35:00.000-07:00

So this is a blogworthy moment that is definitely worth talking about and sadly, the pictures are dark and don't do it justice. Sometimes on Tuesdays nights, I venture up the the Institute to take a class. Last night I got my times mixed up and got there at the very end. I was sitting out in the lobby waiting for Elissa and enjoying the people watching that comes with attending the Institute.
There was this cute little pubescent couple who were so in love, it almost made me sick. On a side note, isn't it funny how the older we get, the younger everyone gets?? I kid you not, these kids looked like they were sophomores in highschool. As I watched them embrace and stare into one another's eyes, my phone rang and it was my brother Adam. We were in the middle of a convo when all of the sudden, these two little lovebirds start making out in the middle of the Institute lobby!! Honestly, who does that?? I was so infatuated by the whole thing that I just couldn't stop staring. No really, my eyes could not leave them. This was no little kiss, it was definitely passionate. He kept pulling her closer and closer, it was almost too graphic to watch. But, let me assure you, I was not the only one watching. There were several others around me who were also intrigued.
They must have decided that it was a little odd to be standing up so they moved their session to the chair. I was surprised that she didn't strattle him because they continued to get it on for quite some time. I know the picture is dark but this is the best one I could get. Come on folks...get a room.

where oh where have we gone?

2008-02-07T17:03:00.000-07:00

I know that alli and myself have a loyal fan base. Because of this, i not only question how much spare time you have on your hands...BUT ALSO i decided it was about time i took a break from very important gossip girl (mon @ 7) to talk about our lives.
so you ask yourselves, "where have they gone"? I can only answer for myself, so that means i challenge alli to fill you in on her life...

Jud and i got little bored in Vegas seeing as how we don't drink, not too fond of strippers, and every time i tried to sneak away for a lovely little hand of blackjack- Jud decided to conveniently quote President Hinckley's talk about gambling. well let just say that ruined that plan!
Next stop on Liz's tour bus of fun...

We successfully found ourselves in Park City during Sundance, but we VERY unsuccessfully stalked celebrities. Dan might have scared them away.
and then there was the day we...

yes...we scarificied our health as you can see (alli had an eye disease and i had a minor stomach problem resulting in some serious issues) to get a kiss on new years eve. Apparently our "hotness" was over looked because no one got any except, of course elissa (who kissed an in the closet gay man...).

***QUESTION for the wise: Why does alli always hold a drink and look drunk? hmmmm...
Next stop:
I feel like this is so obvious-- but it IS winter and what can you do in the winter besides get hot chocolate and a dunford at the SEV....play in the snow!

I wanted to tell you about the day alli and i broke into wheeler farm to meet some of our furry friends, BUT i cant because alli ha the pictures....hint hint.
Did i mention EVERYONE should watch gossip girl? oh, i think i already did...

Happy New Year!!

2008-01-02T16:41:00.000-07:00

So...we didn't blog at all in the month of December because we were super busy with all the festivities! We made a trip to cali to watch the Utes, stopped off at Vegas on the way home, celebrated my bday along with ringing in 2008! First off, Cali...

The Utes pulled out a victory. Wahoo!!

A salute to the Navy

Hammer was nice enough to let us crash at his pad.

Our trusty rental, the cobalt....

After a few days in LA, we headed off to Vegas with a stop at Buffalo Bills to be the only ones riding the rollercoaster in 30 degree weather. Ask Elissa, everything that happened there, stayed there...

Our orange dream machine that took us there.

Thanks for letting us crash at your house Ernie!

A great time was had by all! Go UTES!

Thanksgiving Extravaganza!

2007-11-26T10:12:00.000-07:00

So, every year, my extended family does a Thanksgiving shootout. It brings out the white trash side of us, which we love. We have been doing this for as long as I can remember and I have been losing in the first round for as long as I can remember. It does leave some down time to be creative out there on the west side. A few years ago, Brooke, Mikey and I decided that we were going to make a "Gun" calendar. The pictures were taken yet the calendar was never born. Maybe this year... The Michigan Stews have also won the "Reeses Cup" competition for as long as I can remember. My bros are usually in the finals but we can never seem to pull out a win. This year, Chris had to work so we were leaning on Adam and Mike. My poor dad is the king of choking under pressure so he was hopeless. Adam and Mike and to go head to head in the semis and Adam prevailed.

This unfortunately was not the end of the battle. He then had to go up against the reiging champ, my cousin Scott. Although he was pale and shakey, he defeated him. The rest of us were just as surprised as he was that we had made it to the finals. This would be the toughest battle of all. He had to go against the mother ship, my uncle Bruce. Adam isn't very good under pressure and I knew it was bad when he needed to throw up before he shot.
To our dismay, the pressure was too much. Between the bribes from my dad and the thought of being disowned from the family, he choked and the Parkridge Stews lost again.

On a happier note, we had a lovely Thanksgiving and Luke was privledged to have his own meal. Solid foods for the first time! What a champ!

Pageant Time!!!

2007-11-08T10:05:00.001-07:00

A couple of weeks ago, we had the chance to go to the Miss Utah/Teen Utah USA pageant. Let me tell you, those girls can strut and pose like it's nobody's business. Between the MC's that desperately tried to be funny but miserably failed, and the former beauty queens who sat in the audience crowns and all, it was a fabulous night.
As we took our seats, I wondered, "who comes to these things?" Apparently,it is only parents, former pageant queens, and us. Luckily we were able to move from our $25 seats to $75 seats because of the lack of attendees.

As we were walking in, we collectively decided that we would pick a girl and cheer for her the whole time. This cute little high schooler was holding up this sign for Anya. We soon found out that Anya was his girlfriend from Jordan Landing. Bless her little heart, she made it into the top 10. It was a good thing she did because her boyfriend looked like he was going to pass out before her name was called. AND, who lives on Antelope Island?? Whoever it is, they were well represented along with a bunch of other made up places in Utah.

This picture was taken at intermission 2 HOURS into the show! If those girls would just walk a little faster and not pose for 20 seconds at 4 different points on the stage, it would have cut at least an hour off the show. We were exhausted by intermission and decided to take our party elsewhere.

We later found out that Anya didn't win and the title was taken by a former Miss Utah in the Miss America pageant. The nerve....Seriously, you've had your walk down the runway, give someone else a chance! Regardless, it was good times.

We are going private

2007-11-06T16:02:00.000-07:00

Hey!
We have decided to make our blog private so all the creepy people that follow it can't anymore. Send us your email (alli562@gmail.com or lizadamskennedy@gmail.com) if you want to follow it. Thanks!

Alli & Liz

Let's get Physical

2007-11-01T22:51:00.000-06:00

A story by liz and alli at 10:52PM

I gotta handle you just right,
You know what I mean
I took you to an intimate restaurant,
Then to a suggestive movie
There's nothin' left to talk about,
Unless it's horizontally

Let's get physical, physical,
I wanna get physical, let's get into physical
Let me hear your body talk,
Your body talk, let me hear your body talk

What do you get when you put 5 gals wanting to remake Olivia Newton John's "Let's get Physical" music video?

First comes the body auditions. With enough spandex, big hair and bright makeup, anything is possible. Between Elissa's frufru tutu and her hand-me-down panties from her highschool cheerleading days, we were a sight for sore eyes.

The men in our entourage wouldn't do so we had to pick up these sly dogs (Patrick & Steven) and bring them along. Needless to say, they made it.
Even though our peeps wouldn't work, they had tight buns. Meanwhile, Cindy Lauper and Elvis started making their own video while Johnny Mac longingly watched from afar.

Next, came the dance auditions. If you have seen Liz dance, you know that she didn't make it, Elvis only wanted to dance to blue suede shoes, and Johnny Mac's shorts were cut so high that his moves scared the ladies away. In the end, Elissa wanted to go to bed, and I needed a drink. Here's to getting sloshed!

JK. The end.

100 things you know or don't know about me - or care for that matter

2007-10-27T22:17:00.000-06:00

I'm sitting my hotel room on a Saturday night in Philadelphia with nothing to do and I've heard this is theraputic....so hear it goes!

1) I have the best parents in the world! I want the kind of marriage that they have and after 32+ years, they are still in love.
2) At this stage of my life, I love my independence a little more than I probably should.
3) I never thought I would say this but I will probably go back to school and get a masters in human resources-for those wondering, yes, it does exist.
4) I have been taking a tap class for 4 years and I am pretty damn good.
5) I can honestly say that I love my job!!
6) Even though I moved out 8 months ago, I go to my parents house at least 3 times a week.
7) I'm a sucker for mocha ice cream, actually mocha anything. If I drank coffee, I know I would drink 10 cups a day.
8) I only wash my hair twice a week.
9) I regret not going on a mission.
10) I want to be fluent in spanish and will do what it takes to get there.
11) I get the greatest pleasure when I serve and I would love to start a humanitarian organization one day.
12) I'm so excited to be a mom!
13) I am goofy and sometimes don't act my age.
14) If I could live anywhere, it would be at Lake Powell. There is something magical about that place.
15) I was a ballerina for 12 years.
16) My absolute number one celebrity crush is Dennis Quaid.
17) I LOVE to play tennis.
18) Neil Diamond is my idle in more ways than one.
19) I am surrounded by good men in my life. My dad and brothers are fantastic people.
20) My mom is the most talented person I know.
21) I am a daddy's girl.
22) I may have a slight shopping addiction. I am trying to control it.
23) I have an obsession with hair products. I love trying new ones!
24) I LOVE my jeep cherokee but the day I take it offroading with be a cold day in hell.
25) I wish growing up that I played soccer but I think my mom made me dance, which I ended up loving.
26) I want to be like my grandpa when I grow up.
27) I'm not a good communicator - I'm working on it.
28) Up until this point in my life, I have always had more guy friends than girlfriends and I wouldn't change that for the world.
29) I have only been in love once and I didn't realize it til it was gone.
31) Not having any sisters, I love having a sister-in-law.
32) I love quirky comedy (i.e. The Office, Arrested Development, Waiting for Guffman)
33) I swear that one day I will be a good cook.
34) I love a good Sunday drive, it's good think time.
35) I had the best childhood ever! Every memory is a good one.
36) My dad is the Christmas man, he sells commercial Christmas decorations for a living.
37) I used to make fun of redheads until my adorable nephew was born.
38) Going to South America changed my whole outlook on life.
39) My favorite meal is my mom's chicken lasagne.
40) I would be content with all boys but I only want one girl-too much drama.
41) I could write a book about the number of bad dates I have been on.
42) I want to own horses one day.
43) I used to be a blonde....they don't have more fun.
44) I love watching sports, I know this is weird but I especially LOVE watching golf.
45) I've never heard of a 5 minute shower. I like em long.
46) I love my dog like he's a sibling and I'm going to need therapy when he dies.
47) I am closer with our family's best friends than I am with any of my extended family.
48) I love to waterski and I should be much better than I actually am.
49) I could lay in the sun forever.
50) I have an obsession with my split ends. I could look at my hair for hours.
51) I ALWAYS wear heals unless I am with a short man.
52) I own a onesie that fits me with room to grow.
53) I learned to play golf this summer and with some practice, might be pretty good.
54) For years, my favorite movie was Twister.
55) My brother Mike is the funniest person I know. He is what I miss most about living at home....and Riley.
56) My brother Chris is the hardest worker. That guy works 12 hour days and never complains.
57) I wish I had Adam's heart. He will do anything for anyone at anytime.
58) I am very optimistic and probably a little too laid back.
59) I want to marry someone like my dad. I know....it's gonna be tough.
60) I can't whistle.
61) I love making other people happy and would much rather spend money on someone else as opposed to myself.
62) I think I should really be left-handed. I do everything with my left hand.
63) I wish I had thicker hair-I would save tons of money on volumizing hair products.
64) I have an obsession with reality tv. I can sit down, watch something I have never seen before and become totally addicted.
65) I love trashy magazines. I would love a monthly suscription but I think that would be borderline ridiculous.
66) If you don't know me, you might think I am shy.
67) Like shopping, I am addicted to finding new songs on itunes.
68) I hate flying!! Sitting on a plane for more than 4 hours makes me mean.
69) On the other hand, I am always up for a good road trip.
70) My birthday is on New Year's Eve, the crappiest holiday ever.
71) I truly believe that what doesn't kill you will only make you stronger.
72) I am grateful for my trials. Without them, I wouldn't be the person I am today.
73) I love the Nutcracker and force whoever I am dating at Christmas to come with me, whether they like it or not.
74) I love country music, it always makes me happy.
75) I live Utah and don't ski. There is something seriously wrong with that.
76) I tend to fall in love with all of my boyfriend's families and when it doesn't work out, I usually miss them more than him.
77) I have been blessed with spectacular friends. Each of them have qualities that I truly admire.
78) From 7th to 12th grade, I peed my pants on multiple occasions.
79) I'm not as spontaneous as I would like to be.
80) I have my own signature dance move, some of you know what I'm talking about.
81) I love flowers and I have been known to buy them for myself.
82) Costco is the greatest store ever invented.
83) I tried to become a runner, til I realized how much I hated it.
84) I have never in my life had bangs and chicken out everytime I get my hair cut.
85) I religiously get my hair cut every 8 weeks.
86) I have the best nails and love to give myself arm tickles.
87) I love Little Debbie and she makes the greatest oatmeal pies!
88) I have a dent in my leg. Ask me sometime and I will show you.
89) I can't go to bed earlier than 11PM.
90) I used to wear swimsuit bottoms when I ran out of underwear.
91) I love the church and I wish I knew more than I do, something to strive for.
92) I could be with my family all the time and never get sick of them.
93) I should have studied way more in college than I did.
94) I know what I want and I am never going to settle.
95) Speaking of settling, I could play Settlers of Catan every night.
96) I love hot chocolate, every flavor imaginable with lots of whip cream.
97) One day, I will learn how to play the harp.
98) I drive at least 10 miles over the speed limit everywhere I go.
99) I hate feet, not my own, just everyone else's.
100)I love my life! I have been richly blessed!

Alli

My side of the story~

2007-10-23T18:03:00.000-06:00

Really alli makes it seem like it was all hearts and flowers on Saturday. Oh wait, there were some hearts. Mainly coming from Elissa and her date, but also coming from my dates carving abilities. Wow, alli found quite the gem in terms of the carving department. I have been known to get a little competitive and that does not exclude carving pumpkins. But luckily the only criteria for the date be that he have mad skills with a knife (does that sound right??). Well he did and we ended up with a ...spider and a heart. okay so we sucked... but look at alli's!!? What is that! (yes one eye is bigger than the other!)

Pumpkins and Pizza!

2007-10-23T17:56:00.000-06:00

On Saturday night, we decided to venture out of our comfort zones and plan a date night. Knowing us, something like this wouldn't have actually happened but Elissa decided to take the fist leap and ask someone out. When this happened, Liz and I were desperate to find dates and it may be hardest thing we have ever had to do. In my younger years, I had no problem finding a date. If I didn't have anyone I was interested in, I had about 20 back ups that I could take. These days, all my friends are married so finding someone that I actually want to go out sometimes puts me in a pickle. Luckily, my good friend Katie Christensen came through and found me a man! Thanks Katie!

Our pumpkins! I know mine looks slightly handi but I swear we followed the pattern!

Is there love in the air?? Who carves a heart with your initials in it on a first/blind date?? Think about that...

Oh Eli, your sarcasm was a "real treat".

Overall, gay old times were had, it was one for the books!

It was a long day....

2007-10-23T17:45:00.001-06:00

The looks on our faces say it all...Let's just say it was a long Friday. AND, we would like to introduce our friend Lance. Poor Lance has to listen to our cubicle conversations on a DAILY basis, poor sap. He is our controller so all the money goes in and out through Lance. Our boss is Danny Lee. Now I know what you are thinking. "How cute, a little asian man!" I know you are thinking that because that is what I thought before I met Danny. The 4 of us make a pretty good combo, if I do say so myself!

three hot lunch ladies, two spandex clad girls and a white dove in a tall tree

2007-10-23T13:33:00.000-06:00

I must say these pictures bring me back to the days when every year i was a different form of a clown. Let me explain...88' clown with big hair (my own hair sprayed high), 89' clown with big feet (my own once again), 89' clown with costume too short (i grew...).
ANYWAY, let me just say this weekend i went away from the trauma of my youth and we decided to be very eco-friendly trees. What better way to represent nature than to cut it down? We only had a couple of set backs. Let me tell them to you in order of difficulty:
1. I did not realize that a "landscaped" yard actually might be affected if i decided to take down a tree for this small project. My mom however did realize. Let's just say that she maybe told me to "borrow" from the church next time...
2. Did you know that duct tape catches on hair, thus ripping, milding causing pain? Also FYI, duct tape cuts off circulation when not properly wrapped around the body (this one i only realized when my fingers turned blue...)
3. Have you ever tried driving as a tree? Even worse have you ever tried hitting on the men in the car next to you as a tree (it does not work in your favor). Which is why Ally Baldwin WILLINGLY took over where alli could not preform.
4. Have you ever tried dancing as a tree? Refer to Exhibit A....look at my face...even worse-look at Elissa's face (yes she might have lived up to the role and drank like a skank...lol).
5. LAst but not least i have not seen my body be this plastered to itself since 1998 when we were saran wrapped dolls for halloween...because this time between the duct tape and the spandex i was a whole new women!!!

The remaining 5.....

2007-09-25T16:18:00.000-06:00

Liz failed to mention the remaining 5 of the top 10 so here it goes:

6) Our sweet bowling tournament at work. Let's just say that no one was excited but it ended up being so fun including a few swears by "the boss".

7) Our planned Costco runs at lunch so that we can strategically hit all the tasters. Might I add that today's run only had 2.

8) That sweet week where Ryan Byrd's whole week consisted of different outfits from China and that one day where he came as a cowboy. (See below)

9) Free lunch at the country club
10) The day that one of our employees got his "employee of the month" plaque stolen. All hell broke loose around the office until that $3.50 gem was returned. Few!!

BEST job ever

2007-09-25T15:36:00.000-06:00

TOP TEN FUNNIEST WORK MOMENTS (IN SEPTEMBER OF COURSE!!)
1. "Don't steal the water beotch" (what i really wanted to write to my fellow employees about taking the water bottles in the breakroom)
2. "Dear Alli (apparently the office nazi),
Would you or Gary care if I bring a smelly candle to work?
love, **"
3. Me writing to a VP in a report if he wanted to "Take ME for a test drive" instead of "Take IT for a test drive"...not very funny until he asked me if that was a Freudian SLIP.
4. Lance telling alli he was unsure of his bowling team because "he and ** had a spat"
5. "That dont kill me can only make me stronger"- my feelings about making board books with alli until 10PM that apparently "no one is going to read " (according to our COO)...at least we could listen to alli's favorite rap station while alone in the office
BONUS*** The Burley office running out of ink, paper, power, pens...

this little piggy went to the ...

2007-09-13T16:10:00.000-06:00

Everyone loves a little bum...

Life as a west sider....okay just for a night (seriously, lets not judge)

2007-09-13T13:35:00.000-06:00

Do you think that just because we ventured to west of state street that you cannot all be lovers and not haters??? i mean what time of the year is it? It is the time to get fat eating corn dogs and funnel cakes, get tatoos that tell you are sexy because your husband no longer does and it is the time of year when you can finally pay $1 to look at 1,000 lb pig (well, if you are elissa). It is FAIR time.

Not just any fair, but old fashioned, west valley attending, utah's finest, come to this and we all stare at the largest pig the smallest pig and the babies pigs. And then they send you into a trailer to have you read more about "pork, the other white meat..." sad...those poor pigs. I mean maybe no one else understands the irony in all this but i kept wondering how i could look at those pigs and then read about bacon for breakfast (and how it has less fat than bacon did 15 years ago)! Aside from Elissa looking for wilbur and realizing her time with children is starting to affect her social life... i'd say the pig experience was the only downfall of the fair...
The next stop on our fair tour could have been to a ride or even a sip of lemonade but NOOO, alli, being the observant fairgoer that she is realized that we were not quite fitting in....how else to fit in but to head right to the heart of ghetto 101.
(Ignore the drunk stare please) i assure you i was immensely pleased with my purple lesbianesque unicorn tattoo across my shoulder. I could only have been more jealous to have a growling lion roaring back at me--but alli represented the lion so well that even the man hitting on her leaving the tattoo booth could have sworn that they knew eachother from somewhere (or if she was up to it---they could)...better than the woman giving me the tattoo who lingered a little to long on my unicorn (i might as well have put a rainbow on my forehead and waved a flag).
Elissa was wondering where our dates were...but she found hers on the way home. The problem is that one she did not know him, two, he did not know her, and maybe for a small second we based this "match" based completely on how his very SEXY legs looked riding a motorcycle. I know you might all want to judge. DONT- did you see the last post about don juan, at least this time elissa is choosing men where they could drive their own motorcyle because their legs are long enough! We were proud! (elis- you did not think i was going to leave you out of this post...besides we all stalked the hot motorcycle man, AND it was only for two...ummm ten BLOCKS.) Besides it is better than meeting him while doing pullups at the gym (cough cough, lol)
DATES?!!! maybe next year...maybe not....who knows.... but honestly i am pretty sure there were some guys there that would have made those white trash pictures from the post below a reality in a heartbeat-
If you know anyone who wants a cowgirl, a japanese princess, and a ghetto superstar you know where to find us!!

Tagged....

2007-09-10T15:32:00.000-06:00

Thanks, Katie...

5 Things I was Doing 10 Years Ago

1) It was my Junior year of high school which = Pep Club!! (shout out to my fellow Rams)
2) My fam had just moved to Cottonwood Heights and I had just started hangin' out with "The Brighton Boys"
3) Pretty sure I still had the best job of my life - Zuka Juice. I'd go back in a second if it didn't pay $5/hour
4) Positive that I didn't have a care in the world. My world revolved around the drama with friends, the drama my friends caused, and the drama of boys.
5) My dad just bought my 1995 jetta. It was definitely a sweet ride and we drove it til it died

5 Things on my To-Do List

1) Finish all the stuff I have to do at work
2) Go to Tap
3) Watch The Hills
4) Hit a bucket of balls with my pops
5) Go to the gym

5 Things I would do if I was a millionaire

1) Buy real estate, real estate, real estate!
2) Stop working
3) Spend all summer at Lake Powell on a sweet houseboat
4) Spend time in South America
5) Buy each of you something real, real nice

5 Things I will never wear again and 1 I thought I would never wear again

1) skorts
2) scrunchies
3) over-sized T's
4) Doc Martens
5) leotards

1) A sleeper, feet included. ( I found one, made for a big person, feet and all. So comfy...)

5 of my Favorite toys
1) Ipod
2) Tennis raquet
3) Tap Shoes
4) Golf clubs
5) Guitar hero (guilty pleasure)

Best in Trash

2007-09-07T15:25:00.000-06:00

So, for the past couple of years, my brother Adam has a white trash party in the summer. This year did not disappoint! I know it was a while ago but these are too good not to post.

I know that my parents are so proud.

Based on previous posts, is it any surprise that Elissa is knocked up?

The Proud Family

Apparently we are slutty white trash girls. Let's be honest.. When you are shopping at the DI, it's either frumpy or slutty. We chose slutty.

Under the stars in Wyoming

2007-09-07T09:50:00.000-06:00

The Kennedys!!

Liz failed to mention that on our way to Star Valley, we made a stop in Randolph, Utah to visit Grandpa and Grandma Kennedy. Contrary to the look on their faces, they are very happy people. Apparently, Grandpa Kennedy has some great stories up his sleeve but he was a little shy and wouldn't divulge any. I think they were both just glad to find out that Liz and Joe are JUST FRIENDS... I will say that next time I drive through Randolph, Utah, I'll be sure to remember Grandma and Grandpa Kennedy, and their dolls....

Before last weekend, I had never been anywhere in Wyoming but Jackson Hole. Now I can say I have had the sweet pleasure of going to Star Valley. Here are some pics to prove it!

We roasted mallows

We fed the fish

We ate at Bubbas in Jackson

We did some swimmin'

We modeled...

We laughed at Gunner

We swam with Gunner

Overall, it was a fantastic trip! Thanks for the invite Liz!

Make the face if .....

2007-09-06T12:16:00.000-06:00

Ally was a lesbian

Franny is not the only one with same sex attraction (think riley)...

would you kiss andy if he was a foot taller and did not speak...